The Real Reason Bugs Are Terrifying
It's worse than you thought.
Bugs are kinda creepy, right?
Insects are creepy because they control the frickin' world, yo.
If insects quit their jobs, we'd be up to our eyeballs in dead trees.
We'd be swimming in garbage.
And we'd be covered in guess what ELSE?
How's that apple, friend? You enjoying that?
If insects stopped giving a fuck about pollinating our crops, there'd be no apples!
There would be no berries, or cocoa (chocolate), or avocados.
Hey, quick question. Do you like birds? Pretty little singsong birds?
Don't care about birds, eh? What about the tarsier, the hedgehog, the anteater?
'Cause they munch on insects too. Look into their adorable eyes and whisper a quiet thank-you for insects.
Bugs are O.G. They've been on Earth waaay longer than us.
And they outnumber us.
They even OUTWEIGH US.
So can you imagine what would happen if they used their armies for EVIL?
Bugs pretty much have superpowers. I mean, they can walk UPSIDE DOWN.
Some of them can hold up to 100 times their own body weight!
There's even a bug that can make a sound louder than a lawn mower by rubbing its penis against its abdomen.
So basically, if insects ever decide to rise up and take over, which they're more than capable of, we'd all be fucked.
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