1. After a 12-hour shift, this isn't even that far off:
2. You've given these stickers to too many grown men.
3. Your patients don't make things easy for you.
4. You're used to barely cognizant patients hitting on you.
5. You do weird things with medical supplies to keep yourself sane.
6. You're used to missing big holidays, so you've learned how to improvise.
7. You leave these around just to freak out your patients.
8. This is the gospel truth:
9. You started a petition to take WebMD off the internet.
10. You think this is hilarious:
11. Falling asleep while sitting upright isn't unusual for you.
12. You'll find any excuse to change up your scrubs, even if it means dressing like a pilgrim on Thanksgiving.
13. You use this as a lunch box just to mess with patients.
14. You can't remember the last time you had a weekend off.
15. You know this is how patients see you, and you don't even care.
16. You stopped sugar-coating years ago.
17. You always win the "who worked harder today" game.
18. You're not afraid to talk back to doctors.
19. You wish you could surgically remove patients' phones from their hands.
20. You never get tired of telling your patients this:
21. Your sense of humor is only hospital-appropriate.
22. This is your idea of a practical joke:
23. Your celebratory traditions have become...questionable.
24. Your favorite songs are influenced by your occupation.
25. You cherish the few perks you have.
26. You know how to prioritize.
Ain't nobody got time for that.