1. No, dog. That's not how you take a nap.
2. That's not how you eat your dinner.
3. Dog. This is not how you welcome your human home after a long day.
4. You're supposed to stick your head out the window.
5. This isn't how you play, dog. Try fetch.
6. OK, maybe fetch is a little out of your league.
7. Dogs don't pee like this.
8. How... how... did you even get into this position, dog?
9. This is not how we go for walks.
10. This is not how we beg for treats.
11. And this is certainly not how we use the doggy door.
12. Dog. YOU are supposed to protect the homestead.
13. And that trap was for the raccoons.
14. That's a great seal impression but you are a DOG, dog.
15. Dog.
16. Not how we go for rides.
17. Not how we ask to come inside.
18. Not what I meant when I said "sit."
19. Dog?
20. Are you OK?
21. You don't look so good, dog. Maybe you should sit down.
22. NOT like that, dog!
23. Go play outside.
24. Have a snack.
25. Go for a walk.
26. DOG!
27. Cut that OUT!
28. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, DOG?
29. All right. You win this time.
