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21 Insane Things People Say To Avoid Bathroom Language

"Did you remember to wipe your peachy coocoo?"

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1. "My three-year-old son decided that since pee comes from his penis, poo must come from his 'poonis.' So now we all say poonis instead of butt."

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4. "My grandmother came up with the term 'making rainbows' for peeing. I don’t know how, why, when or where she came up with it. Now I think about it, she might need to go to a doctor if her pee is more than the Y in ROYGBIV."

6. "My mom taught me that the polite terms for one's genitals were 'cookies' for testicles and 'twinkie' for vagina. You can imagine how confusing that got when someone asked me if I wanted a snack."

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11. "Whenever somebody excuses themselves to use the restroom my son will wait until they’ve closed the door and then ask in a very loud voice, 'Are you going poopy?' He still does this. He just turned 21."

Submitted by jeffc49a9b559b

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14. "Every day I take a shit at the exact same time right after getting home. Now, whenever I poop in the afternoon, my family asks me, 'Is it 4 'oclock yet?' Or they’ll just ask, 'Is this your 4 o'clock?' as if I have some appointment."

15. "Biologically correct, but embarrassing to remember: My parents HATED baby talk and euphemisms so we were taught to say urinate and defecate instead of pee and poop. Imagine little three-year-old me saying 'Mommy, I have to defecate' in public."

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21. "My grandmother referred to any genitalia as your 'teddy bear.' As in 'Do you need to wipe your teddy bear?' As a child it made stuffed animals seem particularly vulgar."

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