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You've already thought about how to celebrate your 30th birthday, even if it's months away.You're simultaneously calm and a little freaked out about turning 30.You've said the words "30's the new 25!"You've referred to yourself as a twentysomething just to feel alive.But when you see a 21-year-old you're like, Wow. I am no longer that.You feel an urgency to get stuff done this year, as if 30 is some kind of deadline.You've called your parents about setting up a 401k.You "get" taxes.Sometimes you browse homes on Zillow, just to dream.Some of your friends act like they're 40. Some of your friends act like they're 18.When you tell someone your age, you can tell they're trying to figure out if you're "twenty nine" or TWENTY NINE.You own a house plant.Looking at pictures of you in college make you feel like Time Has Passed.You've rationalized spending more money on clothes because they're "investment pieces."You kiiinda understand what a mutual fund is.You have a five year plan.But sometimes you eat an entire box of mac and cheese for dinner.You're not sure if you're where you're supposed to be in your career.You can't believe you ever fought with your mom.You! Love! Skin care!!!Especially sun screen!You've asked your doctor about prenatal vitamins, even if you don't plan on having kids.You've been on a contraception journey.The fact that Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, and Jimi Hendrix were all younger than you thoroughly freaks you out.You've taken a fashion risk™ that's paid off.You've taken a fashion risk™ that you'd prefer to forget.Grey hairs! They're real!Wrinkles! They're also real!There are younger celebrities you straight up don't recognize.What is TikTok???You're nostalgic for a time before the internet.Sometimes you see a public figure who seems more mature than you but then you find out they're your exact age and it ruins your entire day.You can cook at least one good meal without looking at a recipe.Bars are too loud.There are places in your neighborhood you don't go to anymore because That Thing Happened There.You've been to a lottt of weddings. Like, a lot.And bachelor/ette parties!And engagement parties!And bridal showers!And it's sometimes hard to afford all of that!Cleaning your entire home brings a sense of calm you never knew possible.You often wonder if you have the right amount of friends.You have a favorite mug.You also have a favorite grocery store.You know how to write a check.You have a bedtime.You look forward to drinking coffee or beer like it's a daily holiday.You know everything's going to be fine. IT'S GOING TO BE FINE.Oh, you were born 29 years ago.
