1. Raccoons are excellent mechanics.
2. They enjoy occasional calisthenics.
3. Cleanliness is their number one priority.
4. Raccoons always share their popcorn.
5. They look amazing in hats. That's a fact.
6. And they're always so apologetic.
7. Raccoons will never get mad if you tell them they run funny. They think they run funny too.
8. Same goes for the way they hop.
9. All raccoons are hopeless romantics.
10. They play a mean air synth.
11. Raccoons look death in the face every day. And you know what they do? They laugh.
12. Or they cuddle it into submission. Whatever's easiest.
13. Raccoons are amazing athletes.
14. They're risk-takers.
15. They're loyal.
16. And they have impeccable table manners.
17. So what are you waiting for? JUST LET THEM LOVE YOU.
