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14 Thoughts I Had While Watching Episode One Of The Handmaid's Tale

Hold onto your weird, cone-shaped hats. Spoilers ahead!

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1. Alriiiight, can't wait to see my girl, Samira Wiley! I have so dearly missed seeing her sweet, angel face on my TV.

2. Wait, this isn't on Netflix?

It's on Hulu?! Do I have Hulu? Do I have loved ones who would let me log into their Hulu?

3. Well, damn. I guess I'm buying Hulu.

Via tenor.co

4. ONE MONTH FREE TRIAL? PRAISE BE!

Via data.photofunky.net

Alright, lets get this show on the road. Turn back now, lest ye be spoiled!

5. Okay, seriously, where did Elizabeth Moss's husband get his driver's license? A cereal box? He's sliding around worse than me on Rainbow Road.

6. Real question time. Why is there always that one goober in a group of people running away that goes, "You go! It's okay! I'll catch up!"

Lucasfilm / Via imgur.com

BITCH YOU AIN'T CATCHING UP. THEY NEVER CATCH UP.

7. I think the weirdest part about the new world so far is the clothing. Is everyone just suddenly okay without leggings?

You best believe I wouldn't be the only one marching in the streets over that one.
Via theodysseyonline.com

You best believe I wouldn't be the only one marching in the streets over that one.

8. RORY LEIGH GILMORE YOU TAKE OFF THAT STUPID HAT RIGHT NOW AND START WRITING SOME ANARCHIST NEWSLETTERS. Emily Gilmore is NOT pleased with your bullshit.

Warner Bros. Television / Via deephungerdeepgladness.com

9. This Agatha Trunchbull-esque woman is kind of my guilty pleasure favorite character so far.

She's so earnest! The SLUTS! With their Tinder! Bah humbug!
Via the-handmaids-tale.wikia.com

She's so earnest! The SLUTS! With their Tinder! Bah humbug!

10. You could give me until the end of time, and I'd still never come up with a sex scene so cringey. So... I guess congrats?

11. Ugh, I really hope Samira isn't really dead. I desperately need some sassy realness on this carousel of fuckery.

Lionsgate Television Tilted Productions / Via blackgirlnerds.com

12. OH SHIT. TAKE NOTE. HANDMAIDS DO NOT FUCK AROUND.

13. I am genuinely proud of Offred and Ofglen for letting their guards down for just a moment to open up to each other.

Warner Bros. Pictures / Via google.com

What they're going through is so horrific, and it would be even worse to do it completely alone. Female friendships make me feel all warm and snuggly inside.

14. So I get that the big cliffhanger is supposed to be "Who is the Eye?" but my most serious unanswered question right now is who da heck are all the ladies in gray around the house?

Why are they also in servant positions? And why don't THEY get hideous hats?
Via inverse.com

Why are they also in servant positions? And why don't THEY get hideous hats?

Ah, I suppose I'll just have to keep watching to find out.

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