Skip To Content
    This post has not been vetted or endorsed by BuzzFeed's editorial staff. BuzzFeed Community is a place where anyone can create a post or quiz. Try making your own!

    29 Reasons Ted Mosby Is Still Single

    Or, 29 examples of Ted being absolutely pathetic. Come on, Ted.

    1. Robin

    Via tumblr.com

    He told her he loved her on the first date. Yikes. Not off to a great start here, Ted.

    2. Natalie

    Via tumblr.com

    He tried to date the same girl twice (don't do that). And he broke up with her on her birthday... Twice. You're kind of a bad person, Ted.

    3. Coat Check Girl

    Via tumblr.com

    He totally clicked with this girl and DIDN'T GET HER NUMBER. Jeez, Ted.

    4. The Slutty Pumpkin

    Via tumblr.com

    He dressed as a hanging chad for Halloween. He wrote her number down on Halloween candy. He pathetically pined for her for years. Get a grip, Ted.

    5. Sarah O'Brien

    Via tumblr.com

    He hit on an engaged woman. It's sad. It's pathetic and sad, Ted.

    6. Trudy

    Via tumblr.com

    He got absolutely wasted and slept with a girl who was dumb enough to sleep with him while he was absolutely wasted. Nobody is a winner here, Ted.

    7. Victoria

    Via tumblr.com

    He knew long distance wouldn't work but he did it anyway. He cheated and he lied. Again you're really kind of a bad guy, Ted.

    8. Mary the Paralegal

    Via tumblr.com

    It only took about 30 minutes before he went against his morals and was totally fine banging a prostitute. Gosh, Ted.

    9. Amy

    Via blogspot.com

    He got drunk and let some skank convince him to get a tattoo. Great decisions all around, Ted.

    10. The Threesome

    Via tumblr.com

    He had a threesome with a previous one night stand and her skanky sorority sister. I mean, great story and good for you I guess. But, again, you don't come off great here, Ted.

    11. Blah blah

    Via tumblr.com

    He met her playing World of Warcraft. Not to mention she was clearly a psychopath. Why bother, Ted?

    12. Cathy

    Via google.com

    He was so desperate for a girlfriend he totally ignored the fact that this crazy chick WOULD NOT STOP TALKING and was driving everyone around her absolutely insane. Get your head out of your ass, Ted.

    13. Stella

    Via tumblr.com

    She had a daughter but he always wanted kids of his own. She was clearly not over her ex, yet he refused to see it. Another example of him being so desperate for love that he was totally blind. Ugh. Open your eyes, Ted!

    14. Vicky

    Via tumblr.com

    He does "The Naked Man" instead of getting to know her. I mean, not liking Pablo Neruda doesn't make her a bad person, Ted. Such a pretentious douche.

    15. Margaret (Betty)

    Via google

    Getting caught making out with your friend's fake wife isn't the best way to start a relationship. Doomed from the start. Come on, Ted.

    16. Karen

    Via google.com

    He kept dating awful, awful Karen. WHY, TED?

    17. Holli

    Via tumblr.com

    He says things like "texty text" to girls he just met at the bar. Cringe, Ted. Just awkward. Just don't.

    18. Jen

    Via tumblr.com

    Seven years having gone by or not, you don't completely forget someone you met and went on a date with and kissed on a rooftop. People just don't forget that. Except Ted, because he's actually kind of a jerk. You make terrible jokes and you're a menu snob, Ted!

    19. Maggie

    Via listal.com

    He falls for yet another girl who is clearly supposed to be with someone else. Sensing a pathetic, self-destructive pattern here, Ted.

    20. Cindy

    Via tumblr.com

    For one thing, she wouldn't stop talking about her roommate which is really obnoxious. Also she's a lesbian. And they had nothing in common. Swing and a miss, Ted.

    21. Tiffany

    Via google.com

    When a girl says she has a boyfriend, you walk the hell away. Just don't even bother, Ted! Pathetic.

    22. Amanda

    Via tumblr.com

    He was incredibly insensitive and invited some random skank to Lily's birthday party. So rude, Ted! And she ruined the group photo.

    23. Royce

    Via tumblr.com

    As per usual, Ted refused to recognize a crazy girl when found one. And (although she had a bitchin' first name) Royce was left at the altar three times and shares a bed with her brother. Run for the hills, Ted!

    24. Zoey

    Via tumblr.com

    He thinks it's a good idea (again) to date a girl that is literally 100% wrong for him. Really hot first kiss aside, quit screwing around, Ted!

    25. Becky

    Via google.com

    She made him chocolate chip cookies but instead of chocolate chips she used "gummi beaws" and Ted should have kicked her out of his apartment right then. You'll have your own daughter someday, Ted.

    26. Honey

    Via tumblr.com

    Despite the fact that he was clearly in love with Zoey, he still gave Honey a few hours of his time, because he's desperate and pathetic and perhaps unhealthily obsessed with meeting every woman ever to exist. You should really go to therapy, Ted.

    27. Janet McIntyre

    Via tumblr.com

    He Googled her which isn't that weird, except that he had already promised her that he wouldn't, but then he did it anyway like a liar, and ruined everything. His meddling friends are mostly to blame for this screw up, but he still could have tried a little harder to not act like a bumbling idiot. Get a grip, Ted! She's just a person!

    28. Carly

    Via tumblr.com

    She couldn't meet for a drink at MacLaren's because she's not 21. And she's creepily obsessed with old people and thinks Ted is like 60. What did you expect from Barney's half-sister, Ted? And if you're searching for a wife, undergrad dorms probably aren't the answer.

    29. Jeanette

    Via tumblr.com

    He fell for his stalker. I mean he fell for and started dating a stalker! She stalked him for over a year and STARTED A FIRE just to run into him. It doesn't get crazier than that. It's not charming, Ted!

    So it's kind of a miracle...

    Via tumblr.com

    That he ends up with anyone at all!

    Thank you, Ted, for teaching us that even if we make terrible decisions, date crazies, pathetically and obsessively profess our feelings, and act like a pretentious douche, there's still hope.

    In all seriousness, the end of How I Met Your Mother is going to be insanely bittersweet.

    Create your own post!

    This post was created by a member of the BuzzFeed Community.You can join and make your own posts and quizzes.

    Sign up to create your first post!