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1. A pretty pastel mug warmer to keep your coffee and tea piping hot all the way from breakfast to elevenses.
2. A chenille tufted pillow so you can lounge around like a cat and also have plenty of extra seating when you invite your friends over to eat the stew you made from Farmer Maggot's crop.
3. A rapid egg cooker that I am warning you right now is going to wreck you for second breakfast forever. It can make soft, medium, *and* hard-boiled eggs in addition to poaching, scrambling, and making omelets out of them — the ultimate mealtime and snack time boon.
4. A set of fairy lights that will add so much whimsy to your windows or the back of your bed — especially important when your hobbit hole's windows don't get much light at night 🌙.
5. A mini illuminated relaxation waterfall so you can always have some of the calming babbling brooks of the Shire on hand when your brain is in full "AGJAKLFGJAG" mode.
6. A eucalyptus lavender pouch for your shower, bath, or bathroom sink that will give you decadent "ah yes, I just picked these plants from the nearby marsh" vibe when their relaxing scents are released by the steam from hot water.
7. A faux-fur throw so luxurious you might sit on your couch and accidentally sleep through afternoon tea straight to dinner.
8. Or a big ole chunky knit blanket you can burrow under like you're hibernating with all of the lil' woodland creatures of the Shire in solidarity.
9. A compact bread maker, because it's illegal to invite people over for second breakfast without offering them strawberry jam on your warm homemade bread, that is just the rules!
10. An insulated soundproofing and weatherproofing strip that easily sticks to the outer rims of your door so you can keep all the snug warmth from your hearth and/or heating system from escaping out the door.
11. A rainbow prism suncatcher you can easily hang indoors or out to refract sunlight and make a bunch of teensy little rainbows all over the place, like your bedroom is your own little magical realm.
12. An "Autumn in the Shire"–themed candle so you can ignore the weather outside and live your coziest life all year long.
13. Plus a rose gold rechargeable electric lighter you'll put to use all OVER your hobbit hole lighting your coziest three-wick candles and even your fireplace so you can get extra snuggly without having to worry about dealing with an open flame.
14. A calming artificial eucalyptus wall hanging to add some ~~nature~~ to your bedroom or living room, the way an actual hobbit hole would.
15. Plus a lovely artificial tree to add to the earthy ambience without adding any extra responsibility (important, since you're on a strict regimen of seven meals a day).
16. A mini waffle maker basically designed with snack-happy hobbits in mind. This churns out adorably-sized, perfectly cooked-through waffles in mere minutes — not to mention hash browns, paninis, biscuits, and even (gasp) PIZZA. Why go to the International House of Pancakes when you can just become it?
17. A "Speak Friend And Enter" doorway sign that is not just a whole 😭❤️ mood to project from your own door, but an excellent housewarming gifts for fellow hobbit homes.
18. A set of super-comfy corduroy pillow covers that'll accent your bed or cozy up your favorite reading chair (which, thanks to all the bread and butter served at luncheon, just became your favorite napping chair).
19. A massive variety pack of tea bags from Taylors of Harrogate so you never run out of options to ~~peruse~~ while you're waiting for the afternoon tea water to boil.
20. Plus a tiny milk frother that makes rich, creamy froths in seconds, because why stop at tea and coffee when you can have velvety-soft milk tea and lattes?
21. A set of off-white sheer curtains to add privacy to your windows, but still let the sunlight stream in — some real "no admittance except on party business" energy.
22. A vintage-inspired storage ottoman for some ~sneaky storage~ for all your candles, blankets, and trinkets that still has the comfy aesthetic of your hobbit hole dreams.
23. A bread loaf pillow that frankly requires no explanation for being inside any hobbit-esque home. This is the closest you can get to making your dream of living in a warm baguette at least a partial reality.
24. A hobbit daily meals kitchen print so you never look at the clock and realize — gasp?? — you worked straight through one of your seven meals again.
25. A plush memory foam mattress topper to quickly transform any old spring mattress into an comfy oasis — this helps distribute your weight on your mattress more evenly to reduce pressure on your joints, so you're less likely to toss and turn (until a wizard interrupts asking you to go on a death-defying journey with a cursed ring, that is).
26. Plus a set of suuuper popular breathable, cooling bedsheets so you cozy you might accidentally sleep right through Bilbo Baggins' 111th birthday party and not even regret it.
27. A mini donut maker you are legally required to own, because no hobbit hole is truly a home without the smell of warm apple cinnamon donuts wafting through the hall at all times.
28. A starter's weaving kit so you can flex some beautiful new wall art every bit as cozy-looking as all the plush furniture, blankets, and rugs in your "I'm just gonna snuggle up here and never leave"–themed home.
29. A light-up essential-oil diffuser and humidifier perfect for emanating a soothing, spooky mist like you've snuck to the edges of the Old Forest on a dare (except it's pleasantly lavender-scented, and nothing is trying to stalk and kill you!).
30. A "Taters"-themed wooden cutting board that serves tribute to the most important food groups: boiled potatoes, mashed potatoes, and potatoes in stew.
31. A nonslip microfiber shaggy bath mat, because the coziness of your home should never begin or end at the edge of the bathroom door. Equal opportunity coziness!!
32. A ridiculously popular (like, over 79,000 positive reviews) Lodge pre-seasoned cast-iron skillet you can use to sauté, sear, bake, broil, braise, fry, *or* grill. It's also built to last for decades (important, when you have that long hobbit life span!!), whether you're using it on the reg in the oven to make pillowy biscuits or on the stove to make the kind of steak that'll waft through your whole house.
33. A shag area rug so perfectly soft you may just want to starfish your whole body on it and pretend the rest of Middle Earth doesn't exist.
You, determined to keep all that homemade bread to yourself like:
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