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AP Calculus As Told By Schmidt

I haven't taken calc. since high school, but it still haunts me everyday of my life.

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For all those times you've been surprised with a test, quiz, or project

When you ask your teacher about your grade in the class

When you finally finish your homework and then realize you didn't study for the test tomorrow morning

Can I put it off until tomorrow morning? Is ten minutes enough time?

Almost everyday during the lesson...

When you're losing it and your teacher just doesn't understand why you're finding the material so difficult

You have had experience with this Satanic fuckery called math for decades now, Connie

When the teacher says, "This problem is going to take up a lot of paper."

When someone who it just comes naturally to tries to relate to your struggle

When you do better than that person on a test

When you call your teacher from home to ask for help and try to sound casual and less like you're falling apart

Wait, is it just a small school thing to have your teachers' numbers?

When you just don't get a concept and your friends try to explain it to you like it's simple

No. It's not allowed to sound that simple when you guys say it. This shit is impossible, and that is that.

When you actually, to your amazement, live through another week of class

When you spend none of that weekend studying and you're lost on Monday

When you get college credit from the AP exam and realize you never have to take math ever again

English majors, unite.

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