1. Words.
ROBIN: the batmobile won’t start BATMAN: check the battery ROBIN: what’s a tery
2. Steve Harvey.
Steve Harvey looks like a Batman villain that has captured Times Square and will kill civilians unless Batman answe… https://t.co/GYgS5ZJFU4
3. Defying your mom.
[my mom pretends to answer her phone] hello? oh hi Batman...i dunno if he's eating his vegetables or not me: [mouth full of broccoli] i am!
4. Daylight.
Just realized Gotham has no plan for signalling Batman if there's a daytime emergency.
5. McDonald's.
[Batman at McDonald's] What's your chicken sandwich called? -A McChicken And the rib? -A McRib [pulls out his batwallet] I like your style.
6. Cinematic experiences.
in case you were wondering it is possible to get thrown out of the cinema for saying "classic batman" after everything batman says
7. Civic duty.
BRUCE WAYNE: How can I rid this city of crime ALFRED: Mental health care access, economic development, gun reg— BRUCE: Bring me a cape
8. Plotlines.
Not to victim-blame, but maybe Bruce Wayne’s father shouldn’t have brought his wife and 8 yr old son to a place called Crime Alley.
9. Passwords.
Enter password: "ScoobyDoo" sorry password must contain a special character ScoobydooFeaturingBatman
10. Children.
New research finds that kids aged 4-6 perform better during boring tasks when dressed as Batman… https://t.co/UkhbhrN0AN
11. Condiments.
A Batman utility belt, but for condiments.
12. Family plans.
[Verizon] SALESMAN: Can I interest you in our friends and family plan? BATMAN: [just starts crying]
13. Cats.
"I'm Batman".
14. Reality.
I’m not saying im Batman... I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Batman in the same room together 🤷🏾♀️
15. Sidekicks.
Batman should have an official animal sidekick. Surely a bat. The Batbat™️.
16. Legos.
pls sign my petition to rename "lego batman" to "batman" and "batman" to "meat batman"
17. And, finally, Batman.
[batman watching batman movie] *batman voice* do I really sound like that