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23 Times Cheshire Oaks Had Zero Chill

No chill to be found there at all.

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5. When Ralph Lauren opened this enormous shrine to preppy clothing and people lost their minds.

People of Hoylake, behold your entire wardrobe!

6. And when Burberry opened its outlet store but you still couldn't afford to even breathe the air inside it.

Just make the awkward 'pretending to browse' face and back out slowly.

8. When this was posher than anything you'd usually see in the Ellesmere Port area:

Instagram: @nsaeventbars

10. When this big purple sign became a beacon of hope to inspire our dreams:

Instagram: @the_don_benito

Because despite the moaning, it's actually awesome.

12. When it was decided that Cheshire Oaks is the centre of the whole damn world.

It probably should be TBH.


14. When Destiny and Elite nightclub hosted Girls Aloud in a pinnacle of awful noughties fashion.

Girls Aloud in 2003 at Destiny & Elite nightclub - some great pics from back in the day

Desperate and Easy for the win.

15. And then it closed down and became Paradise Island Adventure Golf.

Instagram: @kimberlilli

Because the revellers of the North West fucking love golf.


17. When the Blue Planet Aquarium opened its Shark Tunnel and it became a walkway through your worst nightmares.

Instagram: @amyjaybird

20. When they installed the UK's largest artificial Christmas tree and it was ridiculously magical and festive.

Four for you, McArthur Glen Coco!


22. When Borders closed down and there was a fear that literacy would decline in the area but the Helsby Arms swept in to save us all.

23. When Cheshire Oaks' lack of chill became your lack of chill and you spent your life savings in Michael Kors.

Instagram: @jadeboamx

And Ted Baker and Jack Wills and OH GOD WHY DID I DO THIS?