1. You put your health at risk to have the most enjoyable meal of your life.
2. You’ve called the restaurant more than you call most of your family members.
3. You’ve already planned out your funeral and Olive Garden is a part of it.
4. You find daily tasks more difficult to complete when Olive Garden is on your mind.
5. You’ve accepted the fact that you have to be rolled out to the car after dinner.
6. You use Olive Garden as the solution to all your personal problems.
7. You actually consider the idea of loving and caring for a breadstick for an uncomfortable period of time.
8. You use their commercial as a scale to measure your feelings.
9. You’re serious about the Olive Garden slogan.
10. You feel 100% comfortable letting loose in the presence of fake grapes.
11. You become sexually-charged after entering into the lobby of an Olive Garden.
12. You have no problem dining there by yourself, even during the most romantic holidays.
13. You’re on the lookout for a potential lover at Olive Garden.
14. You’ve established a love-hate relationship with it and find yourself spending more and more time discussing it.
15. You have no trouble asking members of the staff for help or favors.
16. You’ve thought about Jesus and Olive Garden together at least once.
17. Maybe twice.
18. You feel incredibly optimistic about your love life after you think about Olive Garden.
19. You accept the fact that this fine establishment rules your life choices.
20. You figured out the secret to healthy eating is, in fact, Olive Garden.
- Tom Perez has been named chair of the Democratic National Committee. He was Obama's Labor Secretary.