1.When Kim lost her $75,000 diamond earring in the ocean and lost her fucking mind.
And Kourtney had this response.
2.When Kim had her own blood injected into her face in the name of youthfulness and beauty.
3.When Khloé swigged from a bottle of champagne while French Montana brandished a gun.
4.That time Kourtney was basically all of us.
5.When Khloé, Kendall, and Kylie wanted to be normal for the day, so they got full faces of prosthetics and went on a Hollywood tour.
6.When Kim spent a family holiday taking 1200 selfies.
7.And when she didn't let family drama get in the way of a selfie, either.
8.That time Kylie took a minute of her shopping spree to pose with her fans in the most natural way.
9.When Kris was the most supportive mother ever.
10.When she had her very own photoshoot done and none of her daughters were having it.
11.When Kim just wanted to buy a Bentley but Khloé ruined her moment.
12.So she beat her with her designer handbag.
13.When Khloé directed the paparazzi to the star of the show.
14.When Kendall Jenner got a casual ROLLS-ROYCE for her 21st birthday.
15.But was so drunk she forgot she got a Rolls-Royce.
16.When Kim acquired matching sheer Fendi tops for herself and North.
17.When Scott had a waiter at a restaurant eat a bunch of dollar bills like it was totally normal.
18.And every single time he referred to himself as "The Lord" after he'd bought a title online and got himself knighted during a stay in London.
19.When Kim enjoyed being serenaded by a string quartet playing Sam Smith in a Brazilian restaurant on Mother’s Day as every waiter who brought her food told her: “This is from Mr West for the best mother in the world.”
20.When Khloé came up with a nickname that enabled her to call Kim an annoying judgmental hooker to her face.
21.When Kim was forced to remind Kourtney that she wouldn't be buying her a pair of shoes because she'd bought her a fucking career.
22.When Khloé used a stack of cash to make a phone call.
23.When Kim revealed her worst fears.
24.When Kourtney's water broke and she decided to take the time to put makeup on before going to the hospital, like the true queen she is.
25.When Kim told Khloé she was pregnant, but Khloé was more interested in the fact that she would now be the thin sister.
26.When Kim had North baptised in the birthplace of actual Jesus Christ.
27.When Kylie dismissed centuries of history and claimed that she invented wigs.
28.When Khloé was forced to read this incredibly detailed email from Kim, because she'd gone too far this time.
29.When Blac Chyna got one over on the ex who dumped her for Kylie Jenner by getting engaged to Kylie's half-brother Rob Kardashian.
30.Then announced she was having his baby.
31.And when they set the baby up with an Instagram account hours after her birth that already has half a million followers.