1. Everyone has a swearer in their female friendship group and it is you.
2. Your friends know that when you include a swear word in a compliment, you really mean it.
3. But people who don't know you are always strangely surprised when you start swearing.
4. When you swear in public, you can just feel the judgmental looks. But ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
5. Sometimes your swearing can make the things you say come across harsher than you actually intended.
6. And it can also make people think you're being bitchy.
7. But sometimes you just want to be bitchy, and swearing is the only way to do that.
8. Fewer things are more satisfying than throwing the word "Fuck" into a sentence when it doesn't need to be there.
9. You've been told that swearing is "un-ladylike" which is frankly the biggest load of sexist bullshit you've ever heard and makes you more intent on swearing more.
10. You have on occasion been interrupted and told to stop swearing.
And every time someone defends a woman's right to swear you're like PREACH 🙌
11. Because, annoyingly, as a girl swearing is often the only way to get people to realise you're making a FUCKING IMPORTANT POINT and actually take you seriously.
12. Especially when your FUCKING IMPORTANT POINT is about an absolute asshole.
13. Often, just shouting "IDGAF" is the only way to deal with stressful life situations.
14. And when you can't resort to physical violence, (because, you know, that's not ladylike either,) swearing just makes you feel so much better.
15. Being in any formal situation, like a job interview or your grandmother's birthday party, where you can't swear, is actual torture.
16. It can present problems when dating someone new, in that they basically have to be OK with it.
17. You've told yourself you'll stop swearing when you have kids.
18. And people are often concerned when you're around their kids, but you are actually capable of toning down your language in these situations.
Only for a couple of hours though.