1. When she was you, plotting.
I always have a note in my pocket that says "john did it" just in case I'm murdered because I don't want him to remarry #truelove #tips
2. When she was you, contemplating divorce.
3. When she was you, being forced to watch sports.
Basketball commentator said "One guy. Two guys. Three guys!" And I said "ugh that's my dream" and john ignored me per usual
4. Literally every time.
Thank god there is another game!! 4 hours wasn't enough phew I love this sport
5. No matter what the sport.
I like to piss john off all Olympics by going "I could do that" as he watches and I stare at my phone
6. When she was you, not getting due credit.
2 grammy noms for @johnlegend no one has congratulated me for being the inspiration behind "all of me" without me there is no all of me
7. When she was you, contemplating an upgrade.
i'm trying to photoshop john's head onto zayn's body in a 1D group shot. i have the saddest life
8. When she was you, being mad.
woke up mad at real John for dream john's actions.
9. When she was you, getting emotional.
Definitely just cried at Tom and Katie's wedding on pump rules. Did not cry for my own.
10. When she was you, flirting...
11. ...and immediately regretting it.
12. When she was you, being ignored.
13. Across all forms of social media.
@johnlegend hey I'm alive it's fine you don't have to answer your phone I WOULDNT WANT U TO WORRY
14. When she was you, offering support and encouragement.
15. In all of your partner's endeavours.
I know he has a beautiful voice and I know I am "soooooo lucky" and blah blah but john's vocal warmups make me want to stab my brain
16. Especially during big career moments.
@johnlegend hey u r a dick on @NBCTheVoice
17. And when she was you, keeping them humble.
John has 10 Grammys and this is what I listen to
18. When she was you, living your best life.
John had to physically pour ranch dressing onto my naked body to just get me to shower today. It's 8pm.
19. When she was you, sleeping alone.
I don't sleep in my bed without John. That's not because I love him, but because I am just so fucking lazy
20. When she was you, on social media.
John's terrible Instagram photo just made the popular page ugh raise your "like" standards guys
21. When she was you, getting your priorities in order.
In love with gogglebox. I don't think I can go to John's show tomorrow. I'll be watching channel 4
22. When she was you, needing reassurance.
Touring life with John is basically him resting his voice and never speaking and me saying "are you mad at me" every 45 minutes
23. When she was you, complimenting their good looks.
For the LAST TIME, JOHN looks like a baby so A LOT OF BABIES LOOK LIKE HIM STOP SENDING ME JOHN BABIES
24. And finally, when she was you, being broken up with.
