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19 Brutally Honest Confessions From A Summer Camp Leader

Don't make us use our teacher voices.

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1. Most of your children are hypochondriacs.

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"It was my left knee I hurt. No, wait, it was my right. I do need a cold compress, honest. Can I just sit here with you for a while until it feels better?"

2. We throw away any artwork that the children give us.

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"Oh wow! That's so good! I'm going to put it in a very special place."

*Walks to bin and subtly disposes*

3. Making friendship bracelets comes really easily to kids, but is weirdly hard if you're a grown up.

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We never quite master the art.

4. But we are very good at cat's cradles, yo-yos, scoobies, and loom bands.

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Basically, we'll get on board with any trend.

5. It takes us roughly 30 minutes to learn that privacy isn't really a thing at summer camps.

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Forget texting, sneaky snacks, or any peace and quiet. Even going to the toilet alone isn't a given at camp.

6. And walking around with children clinging to every part of our bodies soon becomes totally normal.

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Too. heavy. can't. breathe.

7. When it comes to team games, the kids always gang up on us.

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We're the odd one out, you see.

9. There is no job on earth as boring as filling out an accident form.

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We swear some kids fall over just for the sake of it. Just to see our faces when we have to whip out yet another bloody form.

10. Even once we get home, it takes us a while to stop using our child-friendly voices.

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You: "Now then, sweetheart, would you like to chop the vegetables up for dinner? Be careful with the knife, it's very sharp. That's it, well done, very good!"

13. We suffer from extreme lunchbox envy.

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In our day, lunch would be a sarnie, a packet of crisps, and a Cheese String if we were lucky. None of this carrots and hummus nonsense.

14. We can turn literally anything into a game.

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"I know, children, let's pretend this scrappy piece of paper is a cute little chicken. Isn't he adorable?"

15. And the messier the game is, the more we actually enjoy it.

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From shaving foam beards to teams of children wrapping us up as loo roll mummies, no game is too immature.

16. We own more fancy dress outfits than we care to admit.

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It's totally normal to go to work dressed as a High School Musical cheerleader or a lion, right?

17. Giving children sweets makes them even more lively than you thought they could possibly be.

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Which is weird because they never get tired anyway.

18. But giving them yoghurts is even worse.

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Children cannot open yoghurts. Sure, Frubes might look fun and unassuming. But BEWARE the yoghurt explosion.

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