1. A soft serve maker for the days when chasing an ice cream truck doesn't seem feasible.
2. A Neapolitan EyeScream palette for taking a little bit of your fave dessert with your anywhere...without the sticky hands.
3. A pet house that'll make your cat start saying crazy things, like "that'll be $2.25 for the cone."
4. An ice cream sandwich maker that is much better than the typical "whole wheat and turkey" affair.
5. A pair of tasty socks for transforming your feet into a sweet, no-melt delight.
7. A rainbow sprinkles crown that symbolizes the greatest ice cream topping ever invented by humankind.
8. An instant ice cream maker to customize your bowl in the coolest way possible.
9. Some nondescript ice-cream storage containers for all the recipes you'll give a go.
10. An ice cream float that doesn't require any soda. Wink.
11. An ice cream swaddle that'll have you loving babies even more than you already do.
12. A set of cone-shaped bowls that won't crumble under your voracious eating efforts.
13. A giant bank so even more of your coin can go toward your ice-cream budget.
14. A retro sign that brings a sundae-filled parlor into your own kitchen. Or room.
15. A jar of fancy salted caramel sauce from a microcreamery that'll turn your mouth into a party.
16. A sandwich press that lets you create the panini of the dairy world — the ice cream sandwich.
17. A T-shirt that depicts the kind of headache you wouldn't want to take an Advil for.
18. This waffle-cone maker so you'll get an ~authentic~ ice cream experience.
19. A bath sponge that won't leave your skin feeling sticky, I swear.
Get it from Forever 21 for $2.90.
20. A writing pen for scribbling down all your ice-cream dreams.
21. An area rug for anyone who aspires to have sweet feet.
22. Flavor-fueled earrings to give your jewelry collection a touch of magic and joy.
23. Scented highlighters that will turn your vigorous note taking into a scratch and sniff paradise.
24. A large plush that you could cuddle with while you sleep, thus guaranteeing delicious dreams.
25. Some sweet pasties to top off ~dessert~.
26. A neapolitan soap that looks good enough to eat. You really shouldn't eat it, though.*
27. A monthly ice cream subscription with lots of stuff you actually can and should eat.
28. A colorful pin to add a cool touch to your favorite jacket.
29. A pool float that may melt in the hot sun. Be careful.
30. This temporary tat for wearing your heart on your (faux) sleeve.
31. And this huge jug of sprinkles because naked ice cream is a crime against humanity.
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.