1. Affirmation cards you can slip to your work spouse who could use after a lil' positivity after your monster of a boss (unjustly) called them out in a department meeting.

2. A horde of 20 squishy friends and Totoro carrying pouch to split up amongst the folks who always look like they're on the verge of snapping a pen in half.

3. A pair of highly rated earbuds so they'll finally get some peace and quiet in your open office.

4. Or a desktop stand as a spot for their huge not-right-now headphones to rest.

5. A water-resistant laptop sleeve in case you're the most graceful in your group of work buds, what with your not-tripping-over-door-jambs and keeping-the-lid-on-your-water-bottle ways.

6. And a colorful keyboard cover as some insurance for some in-the-middle-of-writing-an-email coffee spill.

7. A ~soothing~ coloring book they'll find a spot for in their filing cabinet when they need to zone out for a bit.

8. A HUGE bundle of hot sauce in case the Sriracha goes MIA from the break room every friggin' day.

9. Or a bottle of Mike's Hot Honey (or 12 packets) for the person who TRIES so hard at whipping up homemade lunch for $'s sake but always has puppy dog eyes staring at your food when you eat together.

10. A mini desk vacuum as a lil' help during the neatest coworker's requisite tidying breaks.

11. A ~structured~ notepad that the person who thinks lists are sexy will adore.

12. Our a mousepad notepad to kill two birds with one stone.

13. A four-pack of bamboo back scratchers so they can avoid an awkward shimmy when they've got to get to that one spot.

14. Animal-shaped paperclips that'll help them win the Cutest Desk Award this year. Again.

15. For your colleague who always #tbts their Paris trip, an Eiffel Tower eraser — it'll help them reminisce about the champagne toast at the top even more.

16. Or some junk food erasers to bring the fast-foot love to their office without the penetrating smell.

17. A six-pack of notebooks you can split between all your peeps who jot down every last thing.

18. A deck of gold cards to joke about playing with Benjamins 'til you can do that IRL at your next poker night.

19. A Post-It dispenser in case your cubicle mate has a spot in their heart *just* for sticky notes.

20. A yummy mouse pad to make every hour snack o'clock.

21. A loose-leaf tea infuser no one will confuse with their own.

22. And a direct coffee mug to make beverage breaks *that much* better.

23. A wordy mason jar as a reminder to save those bookmarks.

24. Fingerless gloves so they won't have to wear a blanket in the office.

25. A 40-pack of cheerful binder clips that'll incur the envy of everyone else in the office. Sorry!!!!!!

26. A motion-activated air freshener for the person who's pissed they can't light a candle in the office.

27. A succulent planter to bring a little outdoors inside, even if their view is merely of cubicle walls.

28. And a wineglass befitting Sharon, who will never not find a way to slip looking forward to her evening glass of vino into every work convo.

Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.
Looking for the perfect gift for any occasion? Check out all of BuzzFeed’s gift guides!
