2.
One time I saw a Q&A with Ina Garten and someone asked, “What do you do when you fuck up a recipe?” She responded, “I wouldn’t know, I never fuck up.” The audience gave her a standing ovation. I think about this every day.
4.
Can someone invent a way to taste the food on Chopped while you watch it?
6.
Can they do a “Chopped Basic” for cooking illiterate folks like me? Give contestants tomatoes and olive oil and regular shit and I will still be like, “damn they took that stuff and made a MEAL?” Magic.
8.
When the Chopped contestant goes to the ice cream machine
10.
I don't get how the contestants on Chopped stop themselves from going "Yeah, it tastes bad because you made me cook with a pile of garbage."
12.
Chopped: but it takes place in my house and contestants can only use items from my kitchen (spoiler: I only have gushers and condiments).
14.
[Chopped] Ted Allen: in your basket you'll find cauliflower, gummy bears, an ancient lobster and *law and order noise* a dead body
16.
ted allen: ok chefs u have 10 seconds left on the clock chopped contestant: [runs to the pantry to get more ingredients] me:
18.
the great lie at the heart of the internet is pioneer woman using cottage cheese instead of ricotta in her lasagna recipe. everything else is just shadows on the cave wall
20.
Cutthroat kitchen: cut steak with a plastic knife Chopped: Make peace with your dark past
22.
I love cutthroat kitchen
24.
remember the ep of cutthroat kitchen where one of the chefs made brisket instead of a biscuit and still made it to the next round
26.
How To Lose A Guy Fieri In 10 Diners, Drive-Ins, And Dives
28.
"That's all right here, right now, on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives!" https://t.co/sVvWW6YAkX
30.
stress level: contestant on Cupcake Wars with undercooked cupcakes and 5 minutes left
32.
[Every Cupcake Wars] Host: 5 min, make sure there's no DISmay in your DISplays [forced laughter] Somebody: I FORGOT TO BAKE THE CUPCAKES
34.
YOU DIDN'T BRING OUT THE FULL FLAVOR OF THE DRAGONFRUIT YOU FUCKING IDIOT (smashes TV) probably shouldn't watch cupcake wars too into it
36.
Nothing is more stressful than watching Cake Wars contestants transfer their cakes to the judging stands. Nothing.
38.
[Watching Chopped Junior] FRIEND: Do you think you could make what those kids make? ME:[seeing kids make their parents proud] Probably not
40.
[me, an adult who cannot cook for shit, watching chopped junior] that’s too much paprika, brantlee
42.
Imagine if your kid was on chopped junior and as you watch them compete for $10,000 they decide to make a vinaigrette with less than a minute left
44.
everyone loves drama, dont even try to deny that. you think food network really cant afford a second ice cream machine for chopped? get real
46.
I watched the holiday baking championship all day. For a time I was riveted. Then I got freaked out about how much sugar those judges eat.