It's August, so y'all know what that means! BACHELOR IN PARADISE, BABY!!

It's the most wonderful time of the year.
The BIP producers wasted NO time getting into the drama, so I won't either. Long story short, Blake (Becca K.'s season) is in some HOT WATER with the ladies of Paradise right now.

The devil works hard, but BIP producers work harder.
According to Caelynn (Colton's season), at Stagecoach this year, Blake hooked up with her 24 HOURS AFTER HE HOOKED UP WITH Kristina (Nick Viall's season). ON TOP OF THAT, he ~allegedly~ was flirting with Tayshia (Colton's season) that weekend as well.
In case you need a diagram to keep up:
A little "#BachelorInParadise: Blake's dilemma" explainer for you
Needless to say, Blake is caught between a rock, a hard place, and...something else.

I would NOT want to be Blake right now.
Here are some of the funniest tweets about Blake's current predicament:
1.
Caelynn, Kristina, and Tayshia ready to ruin Blake’s life right now like #BachelorInParadise
2.
Rare image of Dean handing over his Bachelor In Paradise fuckboy title to Blake. #BachelorInParadise
3.
BLAKE WAS DM’ING HANNAH G WHILE IN BED WITH CAELYNN?! THIS SEASON IS MESSY. #BachelorInParadise
4.
The producers when they found out Blake had been hooking up with Caelyn and Kristina... #BachelorInParadise
5.
Blake: *gets a date card* Caelynn: #BachelorInParadise
6.
Blake on the Blake on bachelorette vs. paradise #BachelorInParadise
7.
Blake trying to navigate through his Stagecoach story like #BachelorInParadise
8.
Did Kristina just say “today I’m going to make Blake my bitch?” SAVAGE #BachelorInParadise
9.
Chris Harrison acting like he didn’t already know this Blake love triangle tea #BachelorInParadise
10.
me trying to put together a timeline of all Blake’s hookups #BachelorInParadise
11.
Blake when Caelynn and Kristina both show up in paradise #BachelorinParadise
12.
Blake after literally the first day of paradise #BachelorInParadise
13.
Blake getting ready to come on paradise thinking he could avoid all 13 of his exes #BachelorInParadise
14.
Raise your hand if you hooked up with Blake at Stagecoach #BachelorInParadise
15.
Chris Harrison at Stagecoach planning this upcoming season #BachelorInParadise
16.
Blake saying “so I met a few of you at Stagecoach but I was really drunk” is the understatement of the year #BachelorInParadise
In conclusion:
why is everyone so obsessed with blake when john paul jones is literally there #BachelorInParadise