HELLOOOO, Bach Nation! Welcome to your fourth installment of "Bach in a Bite: The Official Bachelor Recap."
Now, this isn't meant to be a two-hour affair, so let's jump right in, shall we?
Last week ended with Sarah self-eliminating, but alas, the show must go on! The date-night cocktail party continued, and Matt James had an amazing conversation with Chelsea, which scored her the date-night rose.
It's time for the rose ceremony cocktail party! Before things can even GET STARTED, Chris Harrison interrupts Queen Victoria's time...
...to introduce Matt James to FIVE NEW LADY SUITORS!
It goes without saying that the OG lady suitors are not pleased with the newcomers. Victoria went as far as to REMOVE. THE CROWN. FROM CATALINA'S. HEAD.
This, of course, threw a wrench in things, but there was still a rose ceremony, and some women went home — including some new ladies and some OGs. A fallen petal for each of our fallen lady suitors.
A new day = a new group date! It's a mix of some new ladies and OG ladies. OH, and Ben Higgins is there!
The group date consisted of a fall-themed obstacle course, which was, in a word, hilarious:
During the date-night cocktail hour, Anna spills the beans to Victoria that she's had people "warn her" about Brittany being an escort:
And if that wasn't bad enough, SHE CONFRONTED BRITTANY ABOUT THIS RUMOR IN FRONT OF ALL THE GIRLS!
The following day, none of the OG ladies were pleased when Michelle, a newbie, got the one-on-one date. But I ain't mad 'cause they're CUTE AS HECK! Officially rooting for Michelle.
Quelle surprise, she got a date-night rose, to which I say, if you don't marry this woman, Matt James, we're gonna have to talk.
The second group date involved a boxing match — which Wells Adams showed up to judge — but it had to come to an end early 'cause THE HANDS WERE GETTING THROWN A LIL' TOO HARD!
Matt James immediately moved to the cocktail hour, where Katie actually pulled him aside because she was concerned about all the rumors about Brittany being an escort going around in the house/the overall toxicity in the house.
The consensus from Bach Nation is that 1) Anna needs to know that WORDS. MEAN. THINGS:
If the rumor isn’t true, Anna started a stigmatizing lie about Brittany that could ruin her life. If it is true, Anna outed a sex worker on national tv and potentially put her life in danger to be petty. That isn’t funny, cute, or “tea”. That’s fucked up #TheBachelor
2) Katie is too grown for the majority of the women in this house:
I hope they’re giving Katie $20 an hour for all the babysitting she’s doing. #TheBachelor
And 3) Michelle better be the one Matt James gets down on one knee for at the ~end of this journey~:
if it’s not Michelle at the end of this I’ll be upset she just quoted his fav quote and didn’t know it #TheBachelor