1. You can find a man.
2. Or become one.
3. You can get built.
4. Or get building.
5. You can change your species.
6. Or admit you’re not attracted to your own species.
7. Growing up doesn’t even take a whole song.
8. Which makes sense since you can travel the world in less than three minutes.
9. And of course, you can always just take over the world.
There are some things you can’t do.
Like force the gypsy woman to love you.
Or kiss the damn girl.
Bonus Non-Disney! You can remember why Communism sucks.
- A Pennsylvania judge has ordered Bill Cosby to face trial for a felony sex-assault case from 2004.
- Twitter will no longer count links, @names, and GIFs toward its 140-character limit. You can also retweet yourself now.
- The NFL released new Super Bowl locations. The next 5 are in Houston, Minnesota, Atlanta, South Florida, and L.A. 🏈