MacGyver Bee Suit Fiasco

He gets a “B” for effort. This is one of those things that seemed like a good idea while drunk at the time.

Not On Troypdx’s Watch!

It was actually going fairly well, except it was pretty dark and I couldn’t see how many bees I was dealing with, and also I was pretty drunk (I reasoned that alcohol would prevent me from going into shock if things went badly and I got stung a bunch). I was clowning around for my girlfriend, pretending I was being stung. Then a bee got inside my helmet and I started freaking out. My girlfriend thought I was still playing around, so I was on my own. I grabbed the bee poison and basically sprayed myself in the face. That stuff is really unpleasant. Then my glasses fell off and I was essentially blind between that and the spray. I went in the front yard and my girlfriend sprayed the bees that were still crawling all over me. I went inside and jumped in the shower. Then I heard screaming as my girlfriend found a couple bees flying around in the house. So I got out and sprayed them, and accidentally got the cats too. We’ll probably all get cancer now.

I think I got about 80 bees, which judging from the activity I’m seeing at the nest barely made a dent. So… lesson learned. Never trust your girlfriend to properly duct tape your helmet on. And maybe I shouldn’t have had that last shot. Oh well, I taught them a lesson, one sting and 80 of you die a horrible death, spinning around in the vacuum canister. Bet they got dizzy as fuck.


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