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The Signs When Spring Comes To Town

We all get a little restless, we all get a little creative, we all smell the air and willingly pay $10 for a bottle of juice. This is what the signs do when the clocks go back and humidity reclaims its throne.

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Refuses to make small talk about the changing weather and avoids putting away the heavy winter coat; uses the warm weather as an excuse to smoke more; quits their job out of boredom; has a suspiciously difficult time accepting that red wine is no longer the seasonal norm



After hearing a bird chirp and obsessively downloading every single dating app offered, finally relocates their muse and sits under a cherry blossom tree to write creative non-fiction during their lunch hour; Instagrams pictures of aforementioned cherry blossom tree every day for the next week; starts a spiritual exploration of music in podcast form



Fully embraces the season of their sign and exists as stubbornly as possible out of principle; claims healing from their seasonal depression even if that’s not something they actually have; actually leaves the house to be around other people for the first time since December 21st



Starts a brand new journal that they may or may not have bound themselves; signs up for a continuing education class—something related to beauty or weaving; buys flowers for their partner every week to “spice things up,” even though it’s been seven years and there’s nothing left to spice up



By day frolics in Prospect Park and reads A Little Life like they actually have the patience for it, by night gets drunk off two vodka crans and accidentally Tweets a picture of their latest sexual conquest; when the sun rises at an astounding 7AM considers something other than a freelance lifestyle, but come sunset realizes a nine-to-five isn't fit for the amount of television they need to consume



Decides that cuffing season doesn’t actually have a definitive end; starts daydreaming about baby names based off several different partners; discovers a penchant for baking with exotic fruit; still doesn’t drink coffee hot or cold, but rather just room temperature



Strictly listens to Lana Del Rey; burns all of their long pants; decides to throw away their budget and throw a massive spring fling-like party after moving to a remote area of Bushwick to be able to afford their Kinfolk-inspired lifestyle; books like four international trips on four brand new credit cards; finally gets the attention they crave in a partner and feels suddenly inspired by their independence



Takes spring cleaning to a whole new level, like, buys books and schedules throw-aways and donations every weekend until the Memorial Day barbeque invitations arrive; makes a PowerPoint as to why they should get a promotion and tries to get as much work in as possible before those dreaded Summer Fridays begin



Really into florals for spring (groundbreaking); finally gets to break in that portable hammock they prematurely ordered from REI like four months ago; plans six summer long-weekend trips that will almost absolutely fall through; becomes very inspired by the change in temperature and so creates a journal based around their mood and the daily weather (and potentially a mood board?)



Smells the spring air and makes the big decision to reach out to the person they irrationally broke up with in the dead of the previous winter; makes a website for their amateur photography hobby; finally goes out for drinks with people from work and volunteers to comp the entire tab only after ordering Mind Erasers for everyone



Doesn’t actually understand the benefit of a season in between winter and summer; mood is very dependent upon the weather (sees one sun beam and takes up an interest in tennis, conversely physically cannot stop crying if it rains all day); prides themselves on a grand five-year plan that they know will never actually come to fruition but sounds really great on paper



Doesn’t exactly acknowledge the romance associated with spring, but applies to new jobs on their lunch break even though they aren’t necessarily unsatisfied; goes home every weekend for a different family birthday; has their one big shopping spree of the year; buys shots for everyone at the bar and then Venmo requests them all later

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