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11 Reasons Getting Delivery Every Night Is Ruining You

You must be stopped. Your oven is your friend. Let DIGIORNO pizza bring you back to the light.

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1. You are physically unable to eat unless you hear your apartment buzzer first.

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You're like a dog responding to a dog whistle. It's bad.

2. YOU ARE USING SO MANY PLASTIC UTENSILS.

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Do you know how long it takes for that stuff to decompose?

3. You know your delivery guy better than your significant other.

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You legit know where he lives. You could, in theory, be HIS delivery guy.

4. You have forgotten how to use your oven.

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5. The expected delivery time is NEVER CORRECT.

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"WHERE IS MY FOOD?"

6. And since when did you become the sort of person who makes a delivery guy bicycle through a blizzard?

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SMDH.

7. Oftentimes, the food is unrecognizable as "food."

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The beans have melded with the guac, and it's just awful.

8. And you know delivery pizza is always room temperature.

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"Excuse me while I just get rid of this cold hell food really quickly."

9. Or, honestly...super disgusting.

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"What have I just eaten?"

10. And when you order for a big group, something is inevitably forgotten.

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Slow clap for the guy who decided to do delivery for a gosh darn dinner party.

11. Seriously...ordering delivery is just sort of sad.

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Close the laptop. Now.

Break up with delivery and snuggle up to a DIGIORNO pizza.

Just the sight of the rising crust is enough to cure you of your delivery obsession completely. But, hey — keep in touch with the delivery guy. He deserves it.

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