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27 Totally Baffling Russian Signs

Do not, under any circumstances, toboggan on the toilet.

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1. Beware of angry goats on skateboards.

2. And ninja stripper enthusiasts.

Direct Translation: "Attention! Look after your valuables!"
Via dnevniki.ykt.ru

Direct Translation: "Attention! Look after your valuables!"

3. And humans.

Direct translation, "Attention! The dog is mean, and the owner is even worse."
Via margaritova.ru

Direct translation, "Attention! The dog is mean, and the owner is even worse."

4. Do not go fishing in your hotel toilet.

NO FUN ON TOILETS! #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

5. Be mindful of wandering hedgehogs.

6. Kindly insert anal rope before putting on your skis.

New Olympic sport, come enjoy fun. #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

Sochi Problems@SochiProblems

New Olympic sport, come enjoy fun. #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

03:39 PM - 4 Feb 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

7. Be conscious of men bearing martini glasses.

Direct translation: "Drunk pedestrians."
Via hikma.ucoz.de

Direct translation: "Drunk pedestrians."

8. When digging, please assist anyone accidentally buried alive.

Via abunda.ru

9. If your child is misbehaving, feed her to alligators.

10. Dominatrixes should not merge legs.

11. Do not drop anchor here.

12. Do not toboggan into restaurants.

No toboggan in restaurants, this is law. #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

Sochi Problems@SochiProblems

No toboggan in restaurants, this is law. #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

02:19 PM - 5 Feb 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

13. Do not ride headless horse.

14. NO TROMBONES ALLOWED.

15. Smoking rabbits WILL be subject to bear BDSM.

Direct Translation: "Be careful with fire in the forest."
Via pikabu.ru

Direct Translation: "Be careful with fire in the forest."

16. Don't disturb the neighborhood tigers.

Direct Translation: "Careful, there are tigers nearby!"
Flickr: allyzay

Direct Translation: "Careful, there are tigers nearby!"

17. Or the sassy cheetahs.

Direct translation: "Careful, cats!"
Via mikheevaksenia.livejournal.com

Direct translation: "Careful, cats!"

18. Beware of spirits suffering from electric shock.

19. And also tanks.

20. Do not rollerblade topless while wearing sunglasses and eating ice-cream.

Clearly, this combination happens a lot.
Via porjati.ru

Clearly, this combination happens a lot.

21. Warning: cowboy police ahead.

22. Be mindful of littering.

Direct Translation: "Throw garbage here - Die by Shovel."
Via bugaga.ru

Direct Translation: "Throw garbage here - Die by Shovel."

23. Really mindful.

Direct Translation: "Throw garbage here - Get hit in the face with a boot."
Via bugaga.ru

Direct Translation: "Throw garbage here - Get hit in the face with a boot."

24. Turn left for purple elephants, go straight for pink giraffes.

Via xaxor.com

25. When asking for the bathroom, adopt this position.

Who need washroom very badly? #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

Sochi Problems@SochiProblems

Who need washroom very badly? #SochiProblems #Sochi2014

12:25 AM - 5 Feb 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

26. Do not flush toilet paper down toilet, or better yet, take it with you!

Sochi's toilet adventures continue! (Pic: @wyshynski)

SB Nation@sbnation

Sochi's toilet adventures continue! (Pic: @wyshynski)

11:29 AM - 4 Feb 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

27. And always keep in mind this great motivational sign.

Direct translation, "Anyone who drowns will no longer get to swim in the ocean. "
Via sodahead.com

Direct translation, "Anyone who drowns will no longer get to swim in the ocean. "

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