Fluctuating between 1980's workout instructor and bedraggled mom of six50 shades of greyBig grandpa sweater and joggersTurtleneck and high waisted jeans. Always.Comfy/cute with a hint of Skater Boi era Avril LavingeA cross between New England Prep and early 2000's garbageSubtle yachting, fresh Patagonia.When in doubt, throw on a hand knit beanie.Slightly out of character Timbs... you work it though! Will wear shorts until the day your leg hairs freeze off.
Fight me.Well... You're not wrong.I was just KIDDING, gosh!Tru.uh wut had happened wuz*Clasped hand shakes over each shoulder*Wope! Okay!I'm not horny..... I'm in LOVE!!I will NO JOKE marry them!
Sleeping through an entire month's worth of commitmentsGetting a 70% off deal at Bloomingdales on your 800 thread count Egyptian cotton sheetsFace-planting while long-boardingReceiving a 8ft by 5 ft box filled only with papayaSetting 95 loud alarms, only to sleep through your own weddingComplaining about someone liking you too much...WE GET IT, EYEBROWS. YOU'RE HOT SHIT.Eating all of the food off of everyone at the table's plates before they even noticeFalling hopelessly, painfully in love with someone, and tap dancing your way into their little heartBreaking into song and dance in public
Pregame with two dixie cups of red wine in your room, end up at Phi DeltIt ends in some spontaneous release of water (pee, tears, etc)Somehow get home at 6:45am with a broken wrist and a naked girl on your futonSpend the whole time being non-sexually courted by straight frat boys #RushAEPiKiss a sexually ambiguous boy, proclaim: "I'm Judy Garland!"Sloppy and shirtless at the sailing houseMysterious F15 bonding, including bros, brews, and usually burritoesDo homework until the last possible second while someone else does your hair, makeup, and picks out your outfit, then party a reasonable amount and behave the perfect balance of responsibly and wildlyOverestimate how much you can handle, end up either in a bathtub, in a sticky situation, or in a pile of your own excrement
Buffalo wild wingsPizza with ranchChipotleEveryone else's foodChicken from the Allison grillMocha and a toasted bagel from NorbucksFrontera saladRavioliOMELETTE
Sandy Cheeks2007 BritneyCara DelevigneMorgan Freeman with a JFred AstaireAnderson CooperRosario Dawson (RENT era?)A SatyrPatti Lupone
The Lion King ensembleIntern at an architecture firmWriting OpEds for HuffPostA kindergarten teacher writing a TV pilot in your spare timeSuccessful enough to own a small Sunfish which you take out for a spin every now and againZumba teacherStill in Med SchoolMinion impersonator who poses for photos in times square by day, improv by nightHopefully not dead, definitely still reckless
Which Member Of "Poopy" Are You?
Eyebrows that make all the aquatics-inclined boys SWOON! Handsome as a devil, dances like Gene Kelly, and doesn't hesitate to call you out on your bullshit. Hey, Sailor! ;)
Sweet, crazy Ruby had a wild Freshman year of high school (and she won't let you forget it!) but she's grown into a beautiful, kind Daily Northwestern staffer. Is she crying right now? It's fine, no one will notice.
The master of the photo-face, this quadruple threat can sing, dance, act, and did science in high school! 9/10 times you ask, her poussé is damp, especially if One Direction is playing in the room. Her best ideas come to her when she's shmacked like no other, but don't ask her if that's her "real voice"!!! It fucking is.
Literal perfect angel. That's right. From tap dancing to soulfully singing, Sam Linda will steal your heart within seconds of meeting you. Just don't let him get emotional, because he'll end up shirtless, juggling, while cry-singing the entirety of The Lion King on broadway. Or do. Sounds kinda hot.
Ah, Ross Patten. A danger to himself and sometimes others, Ross has the impulse control of a magnet. Owes whoever cleans the bathroom of Jones (and Hale Stewart) a handwritten letter of apology. Nonetheless, poopy loves him.... since he got an iPhone.
Minna, the matriarch. Talia is the queen of Chemistry and leaving food open in her room until it goes bad. Can either be found doing mountains of homework or getting shmacked, or both! Always up for a good snuggle or a disney movie, she keeps poopy grounded.
This Brooklynite is, in her words, "GOOFY as heck!" Dora, an improv junkie, is in love with each one of her friends, considering they're all "litrul flames." Don't fall in love with one of the countless men she wants to marry, though, she'll either throw herself into a glass window or stab herself with a dull fork... yes, that is an empty threat.
A stylish, SoCal boy, Lou Tauber's legal title is the Jewish Prince of San Diego. Where would he be without his Nespresso machine?? Though we tease him with the refrain "my life is so hard :(" we should give him a little credit... when Matt Casler tears your pure, sweet heart to shreds, it's gotta hurt!
Named after at Beverley Hills, 90201 character, Brandon Sak is the True Asshole of poopy. This hairy, nocturnal goat boy will come into your room at 3am and wake you up for no good reason. Does he live on North campus? The jury's still out. Don't say Chimichanga in front of him though, he was hypnotized 60 years ago by a gaunt, unibrowed Russian woman.