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Which Member Of "Poopy" Are You?

Bish...........youdonknow!

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  1. How would you describe your style?

    Fluctuating between 1980's workout instructor and bedraggled mom of six
    50 shades of grey
    Big grandpa sweater and joggers
    Turtleneck and high waisted jeans. Always.
    Comfy/cute with a hint of Skater Boi era Avril Lavinge
    A cross between New England Prep and early 2000's garbage
    Subtle yachting, fresh Patagonia.
    When in doubt, throw on a hand knit beanie.
    Slightly out of character Timbs... you work it though! Will wear shorts until the day your leg hairs freeze off.
  2. What phrase would you be most likely to say?

    Fight me.
    Well... You're not wrong.
    I was just KIDDING, gosh!
    Tru.
    uh wut had happened wuz
    *Clasped hand shakes over each shoulder*
    Wope! Okay!
    I'm not horny..... I'm in LOVE!!
    I will NO JOKE marry them!
  3. What's a typical-you move?

    Sleeping through an entire month's worth of commitments
    Getting a 70% off deal at Bloomingdales on your 800 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets
    Face-planting while long-boarding
    Receiving a 8ft by 5 ft box filled only with papaya
    Setting 95 loud alarms, only to sleep through your own wedding
    Complaining about someone liking you too much...WE GET IT, EYEBROWS. YOU'RE HOT SHIT.
    Eating all of the food off of everyone at the table's plates before they even notice
    Falling hopelessly, painfully in love with someone, and tap dancing your way into their little heart
    Breaking into song and dance in public
  4. How does a night out for you usually go down?

    Pregame with two dixie cups of red wine in your room, end up at Phi Delt
    It ends in some spontaneous release of water (pee, tears, etc)
    Somehow get home at 6:45am with a broken wrist and a naked girl on your futon
    Spend the whole time being non-sexually courted by straight frat boys #RushAEPi
    Kiss a sexually ambiguous boy, proclaim: "I'm Judy Garland!"
    Sloppy and shirtless at the sailing house
    Mysterious F15 bonding, including bros, brews, and usually burritoes
    Do homework until the last possible second while someone else does your hair, makeup, and picks out your outfit, then party a reasonable amount and behave the perfect balance of responsibly and wildly
    Overestimate how much you can handle, end up either in a bathtub, in a sticky situation, or in a pile of your own excrement
  5. Favorite food?

    Buffalo wild wings
    Pizza with ranch
    Chipotle
    Everyone else's food
    Chicken from the Allison grill
    Mocha and a toasted bagel from Norbucks
    Frontera salad
    Ravioli
    OMELETTE
  6. Who is your celebrity alter ego?

    Sandy Cheeks
    Sandy Cheeks
    2007 Britney
    2007 Britney
    Cara Delevigne
    Cara Delevigne
    Morgan Freeman with a J
    Morgan Freeman with a J
    Fred Astaire
    Fred Astaire
    Anderson Cooper
    Anderson Cooper
    Rosario Dawson (RENT era?)
    Rosario Dawson (RENT era?)
    A Satyr
    A Satyr
    Patti Lupone
    Patti Lupone
  7. Where will you be in 10 years?

    The Lion King ensemble
    Intern at an architecture firm
    Writing OpEds for HuffPost
    A kindergarten teacher writing a TV pilot in your spare time
    Successful enough to own a small Sunfish which you take out for a spin every now and again
    Zumba teacher
    Still in Med School
    Minion impersonator who poses for photos in times square by day, improv by night
    Hopefully not dead, definitely still reckless

Which Member Of "Poopy" Are You?

You got: Sam Balka

Eyebrows that make all the aquatics-inclined boys SWOON! Handsome as a devil, dances like Gene Kelly, and doesn't hesitate to call you out on your bullshit. Hey, Sailor! ;)

Sam Balka
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You got: Ruby Phillips

Sweet, crazy Ruby had a wild Freshman year of high school (and she won't let you forget it!) but she's grown into a beautiful, kind Daily Northwestern staffer. Is she crying right now? It's fine, no one will notice.

Ruby Phillips
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You got: Lucette Panush

The master of the photo-face, this quadruple threat can sing, dance, act, and did science in high school! 9/10 times you ask, her poussé is damp, especially if One Direction is playing in the room. Her best ideas come to her when she's shmacked like no other, but don't ask her if that's her "real voice"!!! It fucking is.

Lucette Panush
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You got: Sam Linda

Literal perfect angel. That's right. From tap dancing to soulfully singing, Sam Linda will steal your heart within seconds of meeting you. Just don't let him get emotional, because he'll end up shirtless, juggling, while cry-singing the entirety of The Lion King on broadway. Or do. Sounds kinda hot.

Sam Linda
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You got: Ross Patten

Ah, Ross Patten. A danger to himself and sometimes others, Ross has the impulse control of a magnet. Owes whoever cleans the bathroom of Jones (and Hale Stewart) a handwritten letter of apology. Nonetheless, poopy loves him.... since he got an iPhone.

Ross Patten
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You got: Talia Warshawsky

Minna, the matriarch. Talia is the queen of Chemistry and leaving food open in her room until it goes bad. Can either be found doing mountains of homework or getting shmacked, or both! Always up for a good snuggle or a disney movie, she keeps poopy grounded.

Talia Warshawsky
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You got: Dora Grossman-Weir

This Brooklynite is, in her words, "GOOFY as heck!" Dora, an improv junkie, is in love with each one of her friends, considering they're all "litrul flames." Don't fall in love with one of the countless men she wants to marry, though, she'll either throw herself into a glass window or stab herself with a dull fork... yes, that is an empty threat.

Dora Grossman-Weir
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You got: Lou Tauber

A stylish, SoCal boy, Lou Tauber's legal title is the Jewish Prince of San Diego. Where would he be without his Nespresso machine?? Though we tease him with the refrain "my life is so hard :(" we should give him a little credit... when Matt Casler tears your pure, sweet heart to shreds, it's gotta hurt!

Lou Tauber
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You got: Brandon Craig Sak

Named after at Beverley Hills, 90201 character, Brandon Sak is the True Asshole of poopy. This hairy, nocturnal goat boy will come into your room at 3am and wake you up for no good reason. Does he live on North campus? The jury's still out. Don't say Chimichanga in front of him though, he was hypnotized 60 years ago by a gaunt, unibrowed Russian woman.

Brandon Craig Sak
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