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22 Secrets You'll Never Get Out Of An Argos Employee

*Exempt from the 30-Day Money Back Guarantee.

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1. When working on Collection Point, it's always super awkward trying to fill the time until a customer's item has arrived.

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So we make cringe-y small talk. Or go and hide out in the stockroom instead.

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5. Friends and family members are always asking us, outside of work hours, if an item is in stock.

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Oh, they also want to know the price, dimensions, level of difficulty to assemble, and so on. Erm, do I look like the catalogue?

7. Yes, staff do play with the stock, especially the toys.

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We're only human.

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9. We quickly get wise to all the tricks customers pull in order to blag a refund under the 30-Day Money Back Guarantee.

"Ah, so these Christmas lights suddenly stopped working on December 26 and you don't need them any more and would like your money back instead? I'll give you to the count of 10 to get the hell out of this store."

I say bring back the legendary 16-Day Money Back Guarantee to limit the scope of such scams.

10. Customers always seem to think we are personally responsible for their items' missing parts.

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"Yes, I manufactured this desk, packed it, and deliberately sold it to you without all the pieces, just to annoy you and force you to come back in today and shout at me. Well done, you cracked it."

11. We also learn how to get rid of customers who turn up at the door five minutes after we've shut for the day.

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If you're in charge of locking the door that day, you are the gatekeeper, and your colleagues are all relying on you to get them out the door and home in as speedy a manner as possible.

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13. In the olden days, the most dreaded word for stockroom employees was "re-bin".

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Before every new catalogue launch, we had to rearrange every bin in the stockroom to make room for new products. It was not fun. But thankfully, technology has rendered that process obsolete.

15. We hate being put on the deliveries schedule, as we have to start super early or work late at night.

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Plus, all of us have more than likely banged our fingers several times in those blasted, clattering cages the stock arrive in.

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19. Argos Direct sales – for big items requiring home delivery – are a head-wrecking, time-consuming nightmare.

It's always a competition between you and the customer as to who loses the will to live first.

20. Switching from the little pens to pencils was an end-of-an-era trauma for everyone.

Either I haven't been to @Argos_Online for ages or they've just replaced the blue pens with red pencils 😮 #crazy

21. And nobody knows what really happened to the discontinued pens.

@Argos_Online Trying to work out why these are washing up on our beaches - could they be @argos pens?

22. Lastly, old-school Argos staff were proud to work in a place that seemed to offer limitless shopping opportunities in a pre-Amazon world.

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