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Wake The Fuck Up, America. Boneless Wings Are Just Chicken Nuggets.

I can't be silent anymore.

Posted on

DING DING DING, AMERICA. YOU HEAR THAT? IT'S TIME TO WAKE THE FUCK UP.

Akinfiev_sergey / Getty Images

YOU'VE BEEN LIVING A LIE.

How much longer must we as a nation lie to ourselves before finally admitting that boneless chicken wings are just spicy chicken nuggets?

THIS IS A WING. IT'S THE DADDY OF ALL CHICKEN. THE CHICKEN DADDY. THE CHADDY. DADDY CHAD. IT HAS BONES.

Saddako / Getty Images

THIS IS A "BONELESS WING". OL' BENNY BONELESS. IT DOES NOT HAVE BONES.

Pamela_d_mcadams / Getty Images

AND THIS, MON FRERE, THIS IS A CHICKEN NUGGET. IT'S THE EXACT SAME THING AS A BONELESS WING.

Baibaz / Getty Images

IT'S TIME TO GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS! YOUR HEAD IS IN YOUR BUTT! SMASH THAT MF CAPS LOCK BUTTON! BONELESS WINGS ARE A SHAM. A FRAUD! A HOAX!

Getty

THEY'RE THE SAME DAMN THING AS CHICKEN NUGGETS.

THE SAME DAMN THING!

NOT CONVINCED? PLEASE CONSULT THE VENN DIAGRAM.

Getty

NOT CONVINCED BY THE VENN DIA? PLEASE CONSULT THE PHYLOGENETIC TREE OF LIFE.

NOT CONVINCED BY THE PHYLOGENETIC TREE OF LIFE? PLEASE CONSULT THIS FAKE BILL NYE TWEET.

NOT CONVINCED BY THAT FAKE BILL NYE TWEET? PLEASE CONSULT THIS RANDO-ASS TWEET I FOUND AFTER SEARCHING TWITTER FOR LIKE 17 SECONDS.

Boneless wings are not wings. They are chicken nuggets with sauce on them.

IT'S TIME TO SING IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS! TELL EVERYONE YOU KNOW! FUCK MAN IDK GRAB A TROMBONE!!!

Thomas Faull / Getty Images

TAKE TO THE STREETS!!!

Stan Honda / AFP / Getty Images

TAKE TO THE SKIES!!!

Dmitry_7 / Getty Images

TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT STARRING TOPHER GRACE AND ANNA FARIS!

BONELESS WINGS ARE JUST GLORIFIED NUGGETS!

THEY'RE NUGGETS!!!

CBS

THEY'RE... NUGGETS!!!!!

They're........ NUGGETS!!!!!!

New Line Cinema
  1. Are boneless wings just chicken nuggets with sauce?

    Are boneless wings just chicken nuggets with sauce?
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Yes
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Nah
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Who cares
    Correct
    Incorrect
    I care
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Do you really?
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Yeah, actually. Gotta care about something to distract us from this endless march towards the grave
    Correct
    Incorrect
    I guess you're right. Can't take everything so seriously.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Amen to that. Hey, what do you say we grab a gingerbread latte?
    Correct
    Incorrect
    I'm actually busy
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Oh... yeah. No problem, it's cool.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Well, see you around.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Yep, see you later.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Oh... we're walking in the same direction.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Hahaha "Awkward!" Haha.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Okay, bye for real.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Bye
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Are boneless wings just chicken nuggets with sauce?
  1.  
    vote votes
    Yes
  2.  
    vote votes
    Nah
  3.  
    vote votes
    Who cares
  4.  
    vote votes
    I care
  5.  
    vote votes
    Do you really?
  6.  
    vote votes
    Yeah, actually. Gotta care about something to distract us from this endless march towards the grave
  7.  
    vote votes
    I guess you're right. Can't take everything so seriously.
  8.  
    vote votes
    Amen to that. Hey, what do you say we grab a gingerbread latte?
  9.  
    vote votes
    I'm actually busy
  10.  
    vote votes
    Oh... yeah. No problem, it's cool.
  11.  
    vote votes
    Well, see you around.
  12.  
    vote votes
    Yep, see you later.
  13.  
    vote votes
    Oh... we're walking in the same direction.
  14.  
    vote votes
    Hahaha "Awkward!" Haha.
  15.  
    vote votes
    Okay, bye for real.
  16.  
    vote votes
    Bye
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