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    Posted on May 31, 2018

    18 Reasons Why Plastic Really Fucking Rules

    Long live plastic!

    Everyone knows our plastic is actually a good thing. I mean...

    1. How else would you keep bananas clean and fresh?

    2. And come on, everyone knows a single hard boiled egg NEEDS to be wrapped in plastic:

    3. I simply won't eat an apple unless it's wrapped in a protective cylinder:

    4. And everyone knows that individually wrapped jellybeans JUST MAKE SENSE:

    5. If only potatoes had an natural outer layer to protect the inside:

    6. And corn? It's such a fragile plant. It needs to be packaged in plastic:

    7. Too bad coconuts don't have a shell:

    8. And don't even get me started on cucumbers. It is ESSENTIAL you suffocate them in plastic:

    9. Why buy a pepper unless you have a chance to also buy a whole bunch of plastic?

    10. And pineapple? There's absolutely no way to keep the inside of a pineapple safe. Got to wrap it in plastic:

    11. And everyone knows the best drinks come in a plastic bottle wrapped in plastic covered by even more plastic!

    12. Apples just like my grandpappy used to make — completely wrapped in plastic:

    13. Ah, a delicious naked onion, just how I like it — completely entombed in some plastic:

    14. Everyone knows the right way to eat a strawberry is inside of a big box surrounded by a pink ring of plastic:

    15. I mean, why wouldn't you wrap a Coke can in plastic? What if all the coke falls out?

    16. Two peppers in a giant plastic bag? SIGN ME UP! It makes TOO much sense!

    17. Snow? Put it in plastic!

    18. And, finally, limes "as nature intended": wrapped in plastic and in a plastic tray. Beautiful!

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