7. He may or may not be the dark lord:
8. But, in the end, he left his dark ways behind and realized how stupid twitter was:
WITH A MUSTACHE BREAK!!!!!
14. Because even without facial hair, he’s still more of a man than me or you could ever be:
21. He even went blonde in “Sin City:”
23. Because he has the perfect answer to every question:
24. Because he knows more than you:
26. Because he knows the five most important words in the English language:
- The White House continued to defend rolling back Obama-era transgender protections, with Sean Spicer repeatedly insisting it's a "states' rights issue."
- Recreational marijuana needs "greater enforcement" of federal law, said Spicer, pitting the White House against eight states that legalized recreational use.
- Beyoncé has pulled out of performing at the Coachella festival, citing doctors' advice about keeping a less rigorous schedule while she's pregnant 🐝😭
- Indiana police released chilling audio in the case of two teens found dead in the woods: a voice captured on one of their phones saying "down the hill."