1.
The American who has probably never looked to the right on a world map:
2.
The American who definitely speaks only one language:
3.
The American whose skin is the least of their problems:
4.
The American whose entire world just got rocked:
5.
The American who found out the hard way about May 16:
6.
The American whose number one enemy in life is a roundabout:
7.
The American who has a totally correct history of the Eiffel Tower:
8.
The American who decided to name their baby the most stereotypically American name out there:
9.
The American who is about to be very, very hot:
10.
The American who stands for all 52 states:
11.
The American who thinks all places need to use English names:
12.
The American who doesn't quite get percentages:
13.
The American who needs to look at like, 15 maps:
14.
The American who gets SICK seeing centimeters:
15.
The American who can't fathom spelling differences:
16.
The American who might wanna double check that flag:
17.
The American who thinks only America is allowed to have marines:
18.
The American who has never seen 24-hour time:
19.
The American who has no idea that other countries have coasts:
20.
The American who thinks dates need to flow well, for some reason:
21.
The American who might wanna check their sources:
22.
The American who doesn't quite understand Canada:
23.
The American who spends their free time monologuing about spelling:
24.
The American who desperately needs to go to Portugal:
25.
The American who draws the line at centimeters:
26.
The American who needs to fry-splain the rest of the world:
27.
The American who needs to give those measurements a rest:
