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Why Does Every "British Food" Look Like Something That Just Came Out My Butt?

It's a simple question. I can only stand to be attacked and disrespected so many times.

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1. Why do mushy peas look like something that came out of my butt?

2. And why does steak and kidney pudding look like my toilet after a late night Fourth Meal?

3. But, seriously: why does this look like my toilet after that one time I got a little too overzealous with those Thai leftovers?

4. Why's an English breakfast look like something you'd find in the port-a-potty at day three of the Gathering of the Juggalos?

5. And why does this look like something you'd find in a baby's diaper?

6. But, come on. Let's be serious here. This literally looks like a big bowl of doo-doo.

7. And this? A big ol' bowl of butt truffles.

8. Now, to be fair, I've never seen shit that looks like this... but it looks like shit.

9. And this? Looks like a plate full of rusty nuggets.

10. Like a heaping pile of ass goblins on a slice of toast.

11. But, like, seriously, UK: why does this look like a big bowl of tushy tots?

12. This looks like a pot full of smelly pebbles.

13. Like a spoonful of dookie-doos over here.

14. And if you thought spotted dick would look like anything other than a load of the Mississippi mud... think again.

15. "Milk, milk, lemonade. 'Round the corner every British food is made."

16. I mean, this looks like an art student did an image overlay of every toilet at every all you can eat buffet in the United States.

17. And this? This??? Well, this just looks like a pie full of donk sauce.

In the most literal sense.
Twitter: @d4kkers

In the most literal sense.

18. I mean, come on. Look at this and tell me it ain't a plate full of rectum warriors.

You can't. It all looks like butt cream.
Twitter: @calvinstowell

You can't. It all looks like butt cream.

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