75 Things Basically Everyone Has Experienced But Would Never, Ever Dare Talk About
Uhhh... you tell me.
Pretty much every human on Earth has experienced...
1. The hardest question:
Receptionist at the dentist office will look u dead in the eye and ask if ur available 4 months and 13 days from now
2. The sweet release:
When your ear randomly pops and your hearing suddenly increases by 35%
3. The pants betrayal:
I just want to know why my clothes only get caught on door handles when in a bad mood
4. The pure terror:
I've been alive 20 years and still haven't found the right thing to say when somebody knocks on the door of the public bathroom you're in
5. The gross feeling:
When you try to swallow a pill...but it doesn't go down and now it's dissolving in your mouth
6. The intense monitoring:
Nobody: Me: “staring at the dead body in movie to see if I can catch him/her breathing”
7. The dad out of thin air:
*Movie's 10 second sex scene begins My dad who's been missing for 12 years: hey whatcha watchin'
8. The itchiest feeling:
If uncomfortable was a picture...
9. The restart:
Me restarting the song because I blinked on my favorite part.
10. The change of heart:
When you’re typing a comment on a random post and right in the middle you realize:
11. The sudden puke:
yall remember in first grade when we were just chillin in class then somebody threw up outta nowhere
12. The bite that was always there:
Why was there always a bite taken out of these mfs
13. The pee betrayal:
Me Getting up to pee after being comfortable in bed.
14. The hero of the party:
Shout out the person at a social event who’s the first to say they’re going home and breaks the seal for the rest of the guests to be like, “Guess we’ll head out too”
15. The disgust:
When I pass someone to see if they look as stupid as they drive
16. The quick little check:
Me looking back at the ATM afterwards to make sure that MF go back to the home screen
17. The essential TV watching activity:
18. The mad dash:
Me leaving my house at 7:30 hoping that I make it to work by 7:00
19. The cliffhanger:
When you want to go back to sleep to finish the storyline of your dream:
20. The duality of man:
21. The HUGE difference in ratings:
22. The essential meal activity:
23. The worst experience:
cleaning out your fridge is such a humiliating experience. you bought these plums and you didn’t eat them in time. you absolute failure. you miserable piece of
24. The loss of tired:
Anyone else start falling asleep in a place that’s not your bed and when you finally get to bed you’re not tired?
25. The reason for subtitles half the time:
i keep subtitles on bc sometimes i just be snackin too loud
26. The embarrassment:
27. The eye rub:
Don’t talk to me while I’m rubbing my eye...I’m not gonna hear you
28. The eeeeeeeeeeeeee:
29. The hardest choice:
30. The sheer relief:
Sure, sex is cool. But have you ever farted away a stomach ache?
31. Time well spent:
There's just not enough time in the day *screen time 11 hours 23 mins*
32. The come to Jesus moment:
33. The longest walk:
when u get in bed and forget to turn off the lights
34. The true mark of adulthood:
One thing no one ever talks about being an adult is how much time you debate yourself on keeping a cardboard box because it's, like, a really good box.
35. The smack:
whenever i walk by a tree
36. The sub-zero temps:
37. Ye ol' garbage-can read:
Reading cooking instructions off the bag I just threw out
38. The cup cleanup:
The real walk of shame
39. The $5 spending spree:
40. The tingles:
41. The flailing:
42. The unruly hoodie:
*Me sits down* My zip-up hoodie:
43. The final brush:
Is it a universal thing to brush your teeth an hour before the dentist to try and hide the prior 6 months of neglect?
44. Those essential minutes:
If I wake up at 8:27 and my alarm was set on 8:30 you can bet 100% imma close my eyes and go back to sleep for those 3 minutes
45. The time double-check:
Does anyone else ever pull their phone out to check the time but then have to do it again cuz they forgot to actually look at the clock or am I just stupid
46. The end:
you ever just get a sharp stabbing pain in one of ur organs and u think ah fuck its finally happening
47. The realization:
48. The glory days:
49. The security anxiety:
U know that feeling of anxiety as you’re about to walk past the security sensors on your way out of a store and u think omg did I shove a tv up my ass i can't remember
50. The hidden hill breathing:
Y’all ever try to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so bystanders don’t hear you fighting for your life
51. The line deception:
52. What really happens before an email:
“Apologies for my delayed response. I thought about emailing you back every day for the past two weeks but I just didn’t.”
53. The quadruple overpack:
Does anyone else pack underwear for a trip like they're planning on shitting themselves twice for every day they're gone?
54. The immediate ignore:
One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name I forget to listen to what their name is. I really need to work on this
55. The mumbles:
56. The most extreme sport:
57. The out-of-body experience:
Do u ever drive like a solid 5 min while thinking about something incredibly random and stupid then ur like were any of those lights I passed green how did I get here WTF ??
58. The vibe check:
Me checking if everyone is vibing with the song i put on
59. The synchronized breathing:
You ever lay next to someone and try to breath like them and almost die???
60. The super-stupid question:
yall ever have to google a question so dumb that u gotta go into incognito mode
61. Those clicks:
62. The worst sight to behold:
63. The google of shame:
When you Google the lyrics of a song and realise you’ve been singing nonsense for 6 months
64. The headphone pull:
When you've got ear phones in but forget and walk away from your laptop
65. The intimate connection:
66. The shower envy:
i should get in the shower *2 hours later someone else starts the shower* me: oh my god fuck you i was JUST about to get in there
67. The sorrow:
68. The hardest question you'll ever answer:
69. The sweet, sweet crackle:
70. The remote trace:
71. The soundtrack to life:
72. That lil' awkward shuffle:
that awkward little run when someone lets you cross the street
73. The hole of no return:
EVERYTHING gets lost here 🤦🏻♂️
74. The room fashion show:
when you clean your room & you leave to see how it would look if someone walked in
75. And the big delay:
There's always tomorrow.