13 Signs You’re A Commitment-Phobe

Alternate title: a how-to guide to avoiding intimacy.

1. 1. You celebrate when you meet a girl you can stand for more than five minutes.

2. 2. When your friends ask how it’s going with her…

3. 3. You’re always dating at least one person.

4. 4. You only call a girl back if… you know…

5. 5. She changes her status to ‘In a Relationship.’

6. 6. Then a strange toothbrush appears in your bathroom.

7. 7. She’s asks if you still use your online dating profiles.

8. 8. You find yourself saying, “I’d love to go to your nephew’s birthday party.”

9. 9. Her friends start to add you on Facebook.

10. 10. You learn that apparently kissing is considered cheating.

11. 11. You quickly realise you did not sign up for this shit.

12. 12. Your reaction when she tearfully wants to end your ‘relationship’…

13. 13. And at the end of it all

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