Definitive Proof It Is Impossible To Avoid Comcast's "Unreturned Equipment" Fees

I filmed myself properly returning all my Comcast equipment. Naturally I now owe $360 in "Unreturned Equipment" fees.

Step 1: Gathered all my Comcast equipment

Step 2: Recorded myself giving equipment to Comcast technician

Step 3: Got a signed Equipment Pick Up Receipt from Comcast technician

Step 4: Later received bill for $360 in “Unreturned Equipment" fees

Step 5: Repeatedly called Comcast to dispute the "Unreturned Equipment" charges

Step 6: Got billed again ("Unpaid Balance - Due Now") still including $360 of Unreturned Equipment Fees

Step 7 (Not recommended): Trolled Comcast on Twitter

Step 8: We gave up and decided to go play fetch.

Anyone else out there owe "fees" to Comcast???