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This Colorful Shape Test Will Determine Your Personality

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  1. 1. What do you see when you look at this?

    Dan Meth / Via BuzzFeed
    A bratwurst with way too much relish
    Human suffering
    A needlessly festive sheet-metal screw
    A sex toy from a 99-cents store
    None of the above
  2. 2.

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    The brain of a tropical fish
    Goddamed iPod headphones all tangled up
    Some artisanal bullshit
  3. 3.

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    A caterpillar on the loose in Dunkin' Donuts
    The front axel of the worst car in the world
    A family, not yours...but the impossible ideal of what a family should be
    Elton John's sunglasses
    Just clay
  4. 4.

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    What 7-Up is made from
    A feather of an extinct Amazonian bird
    A hotel keychain
    A Croatian poker chip
    None of the above
  5. 5.

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    A red pepper buried in snow
    A desert island after the last survivor has been rescued
    A Frisbee having an erotic dream
    None of the above
  6. 6.

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    One of the sculptures in "Beetlejuice"
    An electric follicle stimulator
    George W. Bush
    One of Gumby's kidneys
  7. 7.

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    A rancid eggs Benedict
    A rancid sushi roll
    The eye of a hungover humpback whale
    When the planets align
  8. 8.

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    A bikini top
    An eel that just ate your enemies
    When a camel steps in gum
    One of grandpa's fishing lures
  9. 9.

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    When Pac-Man gets killed by a ghost
    The original Batman logo
    A half-eaten egg salad on raisin bread (yech!)
    None of the above
  10. 10.

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    Defective flag pins for politicians in Gabon
    Defective Italian rainbow cookies
    Defective Aquafresh
    I am nobody.
  11. 11.

    Dan Meth / Via BuzzFeed
    Donald Trump's special toupee bag
    Dumpster-diving behind a McDonald's
    Two sloths trying to get out of a drainage pipe
    The divine beauty of sadness

This Colorful Shape Test Will Determine Your Personality

You got: Romantically Adventurous

You are an erotic explorer, untethered by society's arbitrary decrees and mandates. Continue on this journey toward Aphrodite's realm and you shall achieve the highest degree of human self-actualization!

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You got: Cerebral Beyond Any Logical Possibility

My god. You are a genius... Nay, you are THE ONE TRUE GENIUS! This quiz revealed that your capacity for comprehension and innovation far exceeds any known level, and because of this our troubled planet surrenders itself to thee. Solve this quagmire of life, brilliant one!

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You got: Our Next President

You are a natural-born leader. You are both a down-to-earth regular Joe and a high-functioning problem solver. You can rub shoulders with us regular folk and then roll up your sleeves to figure out a solution. It's not too late to enter the ring in this campaign. You in 2016.

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You got: Too Pure for This World

Like an unsullied lamb snuggled in virgin ivory wool, you pitter-patter across this scorched earth, innocent of all its sin, devoid of any darkness within. Your beautiful soul is of an unparalleled delicacy and so you often feel alienated by your perfection. But we love you no matter what, lamby. So feel free to roll in the mud with us sometime.

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You got: You Are The One With No Name

You are the faceless one who fades in and out of the fringes of our existence. You are the One With No Name. Your whole life has been a flickery illusion and you will one day remember the mysterious role you play in Earth's melodrama. Until then, you are separate. You should have just said you saw the bratwurst with too much relish, dude.

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