Gina Rineheart's Vogon Poetry

I think the world's richest woman may not be just the worst poet in the world, but also a Vogon.

buzzfeed.com

I have discovered a terrible secret, Gina Rhinehart is a VOGON. It all makes sense, the willingness to destroy large portions of the planet, the fascination with construction equipment, the physique and now, the piece de resistance, the POETRY. Poetry so mindshatteringly awful and self serving that it makes your large intestine want to throttle your brain to death. Not even Grunthos the Flatulent's "ode to a small lump of green putty I found in my armpit one midsummer's morn" or the infamous work of Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Sussex can compare with the dreaded awfulness of this turgid screed.

Legend says that this stillborn poem was glued to a gigantic rock which was mined from the Pilbara and abandoned on the streets of the remote Western Australian capital city of Perth just down from a famous monument to a walrus, a shiny gold plaque almost entirely failing to justify the existence of this boulder which narrowly escaped the fate of most such rocks, being crushed and melted into steel reinforcement rods for building low cost chinese housing.

Can you survive this hideous poem? Only time will tell.

http://theworstofperth.com/2012/02/13/la-gina/

http://www.crikey.com.au/2012/02/13/geoff-lemon-gina-your-poetic-licence-is-revoked/

Our Future

The globe is sadly groaning with debt, poverty and strife

And billions now are pleading to enjoy a better life

Their hope lies with resources buried deep within the earth

And the enterprise and capital which give each project worth

Is our future threatened with massive debts run up by political hacks

Who dig themselves out by unleashing rampant tax

The end result is sending Australian investment, growth and jobs offshore

This type of direction is harmful to our core

Some envious unthinking people have been conned

To think prosperity is created by waving a magic wand

Through such unfortunate ignorance, too much abuse is hurled

Against miners, workers and related industries who strive to build the world

Develop North Australia, embrace multiculturalism and welcome short term foreign workers to our shores

To benefit from the export of our minerals and ores

The world's poor need our resources: do not leave them to their fate

Our nation needs special economic zones and wiser government, before it is too late