The Definitive Ranking Of Watson Mustaches

Every good Dr. John Watson needs a mustache. It's a fact. Whether you're a Victorian gentlemen or fighting Nazis... you need a mustache. Even if it's just temporary. But which Watson has the BEST mustache? Here's a potentially controversial list of the best Watsonian facial hair.

8. Gareth David-Lloyd from Aslyum's Sherlock Holmes

Via fanpop.com

If you haven't seen the beauty that is Asylum's Sherlock Holmes, stop reading and go watch it... now. Holmes and Watson fight a dinosaur and Iron Man. I'm not even lying. The movie is so bad it's beautiful and while Gareth is delightful as a Watson with very ill fitting clothing, his mustache is a bit lacking. Thus, 8th place. Sorry Ianto.

7. Andrei Panin from Шерлок Холмс

Via russia.tv

The newest Russian Holmes series is a fun and dramatic romp. Part of that is the late Andrei Panin's portrayal of a moodier Watson than we're use to, but still that loyal friend. A good effort on the mustache as well.

6. Edward Hardwicke from Granada's Sherlock Holmes

Via britmovie.co.uk

I can hear the gasps now. Yes, Edward Hardwicke is a fine, caring Watson, but his bristles are a bit on the ginormous street sweeper side. It's a bit overbearing, but it is monumental.

5. Martin Freeman from BBC's Sherlock

Via bbc.co.uk

Nothing caused more disturbance in the force than Martin Freeman's mournstache in the third series of BBC's Sherlock. Born out of sorrow and despair, Feeman's lip whiskers have purpose and emotional weight, even if they make you feel a little uncomfortable.

4. Nigel Bruce from the 1940s Sherlock Holmes films

Via charlesprogers.com

Full of bravado and quite befitting of the slightly bumbling Watson that Nigel Bruce portrayed. This may have been the mustache to start it all and have every Watson judged by their facial hair.

3. David Burke from Granada's Sherlock Holmes

Via davidburkesfacialexpressions.tumblr.com

More gasps! Burke ranked higher than Hardwicke? Yes! Look at that man. Look at his swag and his sass. David Burke's Mr. Tickler was just as expressive as the man himself. Such exuberant stache! You may now continue your Burke vs Hardwicke feud.

2. Vitaly Solomin from Приключения Шерлока Холмса и доктора Ватсона

Via tvrage.com

If there was a sassier stache than David Burke's, it was Vitaly Solomin's. Russian puppy and VHATSON from the stellar original Russian series. It's so precious and matches this iteration of Watson perfectly.

1. Jude Law from Sherlock Holmes

Via imdb.com

The tache to end all taches. Everyone wants a mustache ride from Jude Law's killer Watson in the Guy Ritchie Sherlock Holmes films. Mustachioed ladykiller extraordinaire, and to the point where Jude Law just doesn't look right without that beautiful caterpillar on his lips. He has the best mustache. Hands down. No competition. Don't even try, I will fight you.

Honorable Mentions

Not everyone could make the list, but there are some honorable mentions:

Robot Watson from Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century has one hell of a handlebar mustache, PLUS a monacle.

Lucy Liu from CBS' Elementary doesn't have a mustache, but if she did, she'd destroy everyone else with her fierceness.

Dr. Dawson from The Great Mouse Detective has a Bruce inspired bushy mustache that deserves to be recognized.