1. A house full of dry tampons you have to pull out.
And, of course, you know they're allllll super absorbency tampons.
2. A house made entirely of cardboard applicators.
Sorry, no plastic applicators in this haunted house!
3. A house that gives you cramps so bad, all you can do is lie there.
Hopefully that haunted house comes with a cozy sofa.
4. A house full of tampons where the strings always break off.
5. A house full of all the pants, underwear, and sheets you bled through.
6. A house that just makes you sweat…like, a lot.
You can turn the thermostat down all you want — it won't make a difference!
7. A house that makes you feel the urge to pee/poop RIGHT after putting a tampon in.
You feel fine one minute, but the minute you put a tampon in, you just have to go.
8. A house where all the toilets are stained with blood under the seats.
How did it even get there?!
9. A house with walls stained in blood that flung out when you pulled your tampon out.
You've heard of blood-covered walls, but not like this.
10. A house with no garbage can to put your used tampon/pad in.
Whatever you do, DON'T FLUSH IT! Or the period ghosts will come to get you.
11. A house with no toilet paper to clean the blood off your crotch and/or hands.
Talk about a sticky situation.
12. A house where all the tampons open on the non-applicator grip side.
Every. Damn. Time.
13. A house that makes you constantly spill your cup on your hands.
Or onto the floor. Either way, a living nightmare.
14. A house full of a million bloodied bedsheets that you need to wash.
I feel bad for your hands already.
15. A house that makes every pad you use stick to the inside of your leg.
Or your underwear, or ITSELF.
16. A house full of all the blood clots that ever came out of your body...to form a blood clot monster.
I'm not saying there's such a thing as a blood clot monsters, but... Haunted houses are weird, man.
17. And finally, a house that immediately gives you swamp ass the moment you walk in.
Ghost voice: OOOooooooOOOOoooo!