24 Period Moments That Will Make You Laugh And Then Say, "Yeah, I Do That"
Wearing black pants pretty much every day of your period.
1. Tucking a tampon up your sleeve to go to the bathroom...
2. ...and then thinking, "WTF, why am I hiding this?!"
Because, let's be real, you definitely shouldn't have to do this and kudos to you if you don't!
3. Bracing yourself when you have to pull out a dry tampon.
That awful, pinching feeling of cotton CLINGING to the inside of your vagina is really something else.
4. Being paranoid you've bled through to your pants.
5. Having the "I've never used a cup, but I kinda want to" conversation.
I mean, you HAVE QUESTIONS: What if it gets stuck? How do I keep it from spilling? Will I get blood all over my hands? What if I'm at work? How often do you have to clean it?!?!?!?
6. And, if you do use one, being super intimidated the first time you have to fold it.
It's just really intimidated to think you have to origami fold that thing up into your vagina!
7. Being *slightly* embarrassed when you load up on pads or tampons at the store — even though, again, you shouldn't be embarrassed!
8. Feeling slightly guilty about wrapping your tampons and pads up with a lot of toilet paper before tossing them in the garbage.
You know the wrappers are designed to wrap the product, but sometimes it's just not enough to cover everything and toilet paper is just easier. Periods are messy, OK?
9. Dealing with SUPER constipation leading up to your period.
And then feeling the sweet relief when it all comes out once your period starts.
10. Massaging your swollen, tender boobs in a totally non-sexual way to try and find some relief.
11. Being amazed at how much poop and blood is actually in the toilet after you have a huge period shit.
Is it gross? Yup! But does it give you sweet, sweet relief? HECK yeah.
12. Wearing black pants pretty much every day of your period.
Because you don't want to deal with any bleed through immediately if you don't have to. Also JUST IN CASE, ya know?
13. Getting a whiff of an old, blood-soaked pad and trying not to puke.
14. Stealthily checking the chair you're sitting on for blood stains when you stand up.
There's a very good chance you didn't bleed through to the chair, but you often think, "You never know!" and take a quick glance anyway.
15. Rubbing your knuckles raw cleaning blood out of underwear and/or bedsheets.
It's a lot of elbow work getting blood out of sheets!
16. Owning one (or, heck, several) pairs of what you call your "period underwear."
17. Hating the super noisy sounds of tampon wrappers — WHY are they like that?!
Sometimes you just want to change your tampon in peace and quiet and not make it sound like you're crumpling up 10,000 papers.
18. Only having a light tampon handy when what you really need is a super one.
Sometimes your flow just gets really heavy unexpectedly and you're not prepared for it. It happens!
19. Feeling like a superhero when someone needs a tampon and you have one handy.
20. Feeling like you're wearing a goddamned diaper when you wear a pad.
I mean, it basically IS a diaper...just for your period blood. *SHRUG*
21. Holding a tampon string out of the way of your pee stream if you don't feel like changing the tampon.
Or if you JUST put a tampon in and don't want to have to pull it out (see: dry tampon).
22. Laughing at the fact that tampons come in such pink and ~flowery~ packaging — like periods are cute or something.
23. Wanting to eat ALL — not a lot, but ALL — the food in sight right before your period starts.
No carb or sugar is safe in the days leading up to your period.