I Watched "Candyman" And Had So Many Thoughts, Including "NOPE!"
If you have trypophobia, all I have to say is: BE WARNED.
In case you've been living under a rock, here's a casual reminder that Nia DaCosta's Candyman just dropped! The movie serves as a sequel to the original 1992 film — although given there were other sequel films, you could probably call this more of a requel (reboot/sequel) — and if you haven't seen it yet, 10/10 highly recommend. It's scary, smart, REALLY well made, and honestly just soooo good. And if you need any more convincing, here's literally everything I thought while watching:
1. Oh, weird, the Universal logo is backward…
2. ...Ahhhh, yes, I get it. BECAUSE IT'S LIKE A MIRROR!
3. OK, cool, ALL the logos are flipped. Five seconds into the movie, and I'm already very into this.
4. Also, who knew such a wholesome song could sound so creepy? Sorry Sammy Davis Jr.
5. Hmmmm, what year is this? I’m guessing '70s? MAYBE '80s?
6. Ah, got it, 1977. That year always makes me think of Star Wars.
7. LOTS of reflections happening already…
8. A giant hole in the wall? NOPE.
9. *Leo pointing meme* BEE!!! (On the exterminator ad.)
10. Nope, nope, nope.
11. Is it me or do these cops have punchable faces?
12. Okay, it took my brain a second to understand what’s happening in this title shot — it looks like we’re moving backward and looking upside down?! — this kinda gives me a headache, but I also kinda love it.
13. Oh, that’s a nice gallery wall.
14. And that’s a GORGEOUS bookcase.
15. No, seriously, how do I get this bookcase?
16. This apartment really reminds me of the one from the original movie…
17. …ah, that’s why.
18. That’s also a great coffee table. (Can you tell I’m wildly distracted by the REALLY NICE decor in this apartment?!)
19. HELEN LYLE!!!
20. Ugh, I love this theme music...
21. ...and also the cool paper puppetry. So creepy. SO GOOD.
22. LMAO, “Moscato is a dessert wine.” Thank you.
23. Oh, hello, Yahya.
24. “Your new apartment is ghost proof.” Translation: This place is definitely haunted.
25. Ugh, this art dealer is the worst. I knew it from the moment he opened his mouth.
26. I hope you’re not allergic to bees, sir.
27. I’m sorry, but nothing good ever came from someone jumping a fence. Just. Saying.
28. Oh, yeah, no. This home is a big nope.
29. Literally, no.
30. COLEMAN DOMINGO!!! Anytime I see him on screen, I immediately get happy.
31. William Burke, sir, what are you doing creeping around here?
32. “What’s Candyman?” Ho boy.
33. Razor blade candy...classic.
34. Sad/awful story time!
35. Painting right on the wall Anthony? BOLD.
36. “It’s a pretty literal approach.” Ouch, Brianna.
37. I still can’t get over how much I love that bookcase.
38. Definitely do not say Candyman five times in the mirror.
39. 1,000% on Brianna’s side.
40. Here comes Clive with his annoying self.
41. OMG, this bitch. LOL.
42. Are people in the art world really this rude? (Probably.)
43. Heeeere we go. *settles in, grabs popcorn*
44. “Is this real?” LMAO.
45. Sorry Clive, but I am loving how this sequence is playing out (also HELLO NIA with the awesome visuals!!!)
47. Double yikes.
48. Hello, again, Yahya.
49. DID ANYONE ELSE NOTICE THE SUPER SUBTLE BUT EERIE AND GREAT REFLECTION?!
50. IDK if it means anything, but what’s up with the stain on Anthony’s hat?
51. Loving the way they’re weaving in all the backstory from the original film.
52. Getting stuck in an elevator is a nightmare in and of itself, so this is a true nightmare on top of a nightmare.
53. Everyone has nice houseplants in this movie.
54. Sir, I think you should get yourself to a hospital.
55. Oooooh, another A++++ shot.
56. Love. It.
57. Ha! William is reading a Clive Barker* book. Good Easter egg. (*If you don't know, Clive Barker wrote the original short story, "The Forbidden," that Candyman is adapted from).
58. Uhhhhhh, these paintings……….are, shall we say, not very chill.
59. Just give Coleman all the awards right now.
60. For real though, can you imagine walking into your home and seeing all these paintings?!
61. Welp, another beautiful home, with beautiful furniture, and beautiful plants. Sigh...movie homes.
62. “Ain’t a dick on the planet good enough to offset a demonology hobby.” Lmaoooo. I am DEAD.
63. Oh, did this movie suddenly turn into The Craft?
64. Girls, this will not end well for you.
65. LOLLL of course the Asian girl is the only one smart enough to peace out.
67. Oh, no, no, no, no.
68. Wait, wait, wait…Anne-Marie? (AKA mom from the original?!?).
69. I feel like I should’ve seen this coming, but you guys got me, okay. GOOD JOB.
70. LOL, love Troy.
71. You know, come to think of it, this explains why William runs a laundromat. ~TRAUMA~
72. This is a whole lot of nope.
74. OMG, my trypophobia has been TRIGGERED.
75. OH, I CAN’T LOOK AT THIS.
77. So, William is basically a Candyman fanboy.
78. Oh no...not the razor blade candy. Nooooo.
79. OHHHH. Brianna is...really going for it.
80. I mean, this seemed inevitable. But...
82. But...she only said Candyman FOUR TIMES...
83. AH, the cop said it the FIFTH! HA!
84. Oh... this is A LOT to take in. (Which is what I'm sure Brianna is thinking, too.)
85. Awww. Heck yeah, Tony Todd!!!!