First off let me say, I don't have kids but if I did I can't imagine I would act like this:
We got this lady in the office who doesn't seem to understand the concept of an indoor voice... or a STFU glare.
At least 3 times a day she's in the kitchen talking about how great her baby is, and I'm not an ass....but the baby can't be that great...it's a baby.
The first couple of times were cute but then she started sharing every single one of her baby's fake milestones. Keep in mind the rest of us are trying to work but all you hear is:
1.) "OH my baby winked for the first time today... HURRAAAAAY!"
[I'm thinking, isn't your child a couple months old? they didn't blink at all during that time? is something wrong with their eyes]
2.) "Oh my baby already recognizes their daddy and likes him more than me?"
[I'm thinking, that's because he talks less]
3.) "OH my baby said her first words today...HURRAAAAAY!"
[Really? I'm surprised she had a chance to get a word in]
4.) "She gave me a high five before I went to work...HURRAAAAAY!"
[Ok that was impressive but she was probably trying to slap you.....I was giving props from birth]
5.)"My baby girl wiiiii'ed on me just after I showered...she's never done that before... I thought it was so funny....HURRAAAAAY! hahahahah"
[B****H THAT'S NOT A MILESTONE......... No one in the world takes pictures of those moments or celebrates them. What parent is going to tell a child in 6 years "Hey did you know 5 years ago on this date you peed on your mother"?] NO ONE DOES THAT.
It was my understanding that babies go on whatever they want to, whenever they want to do it. Personally I wouldn't find that so funny, nor would I encourage that behavior... you can't have a child growing up thinking it's okay to do that to people... what happens when she gets into college?
What really gets me is that I can somewhat understand if this was her first child but it is her fourth!!
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