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The Only Way To Save America Is To Elect Canada In 2016

Vote Canada in 2016.

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"Hello America it's us, Canada," begins a new campaign video from the Canada Party. Its goal is to have America elect Canada as its next president. They have a strong pitch. Listen up, America!

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

"As your whitest neighbour, we realize you don't think about us very much." But we in Canada are concerned about you people down there.

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

"Your country is on fire, and your leaders are whittling sticks for their marshmallows."

Then there's the Trump stuff.

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

The Canada Party wants to help. They see a role for us, Canada, to help you, 'merica, sort your shit out.

"So we are once again declaring our Canada-cy for president of the United States of America."

Brian Calvert

Who would run the U.S. if the Canada Party was elected? Good question, eagle humper. "Not me, not Prime Minister centrefold," the party spokesman says. Each Canadian would take a shift in charge, because that's how we do things in Soviet Canuckistan.

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

The Canada Party previously ran in 2012, but Americans went for the safe choice. It's OK. "We were a little disappointed when you didn't elect us in 2012. But we're Canada, so we just went to the doctor and got our feelings checked for free."

In terms of campaign promises, you can read their full platform here. Notably, they would legalize weed in the U.S. "so you can stop worrying about terrorists, and start worrying about your cat stealing your ideas."
Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

In terms of campaign promises, you can read their full platform here.

Notably, they would legalize weed in the U.S. "so you can stop worrying about terrorists, and start worrying about your cat stealing your ideas."

Oh and BTW America: The Canada Party is way ahead of you if you end up electing a candidate who wants to build a wall along our shared border.

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com

Watch the whole video here:

View this video on YouTube

Brian Calvert / Via youtube.com