1. Is this kid practicing Irish dancing on my bladder?
2. I think I can see my nose in the sonogram! Thank god the baby has my nose!
3. Is the baby moving?! Nope, just gas.
4. It's so early to be buying all these clothes, but my child needs those adorable lil' sneakers.
5. Whose bright idea was it to spend the majority of the summer being pregnant and ballooning out?
6. Why do people think "You look sooo pregnant!" is a compliment?!
7. I would give anything to sleep on my stomach again.
8. People can save the baby's cord blood? That's it — we're officially living in the future.
9. Great, I've fallen down a rabbit hole of terrifying and enlightening pregnancy posts.
10. Why does it seem like every force of nature is working against my child before they're even born?!
11. Oh my god, there're so many forces working against my sweet lil' baby!
12. I need to clean everything, and I mean everything. No germs for this baby!
13. I saw a puppy today, and I just started crying. I don't know why.
14. My body is a stranger to me. I have no control over it anymore.
15. I have so much energy! I can do anything!
16. And now I'm crashing.
17. I never, ever want to wear pants again.
18. I'm about to deliver, and this kid won't stop growing.
19. This nugget may only be one pound, but I feel like 1,000 pounds.
20. These late-night cravings are amazing and horrible at the same time.
21. Please, for the love of god, don't let my water break at work.
22. Or in my car.
23. Did I spill something on my shirt? Nope, just my boobs.
24. So. Much. Peeing.
25. I really hope I don't poop during delivery.
26. Did I mention how much I hate pants?
27. I'm not ready! I'm not ready! I'm not ready!
28. I am ready! I am ready! Get this baby out of me already!
29. I will literally do anything for this lil' peanut. Beast-mom mode: activated.
30. I'm gonna be the best mom there ever was!
31. My senses are so heightened; I feel like a superhero!
32. I don't want to get up because I'm lying down, but I'm also suddenly ravenous.
33. Was that a contraction? Oh wait, nope, just gas...again.
34. I can reenact the water-glass scene from Jurassic Park if I put a cup on my stomach.
35. "I'm hot, and I'm cold. I'm yes, and I'm no." I'm actually just really, really pregnant.
36. I'm so afraid I'm going to screw this kid up.
37. My kid is going to be president of the United States one day!
38. I can't wait to meet you, baby; you're going to be perfect.
You can't help all the thoughts that run through your head when you’re pregnant, but you can check one worry off your list by saving for your family's future with with Cord Blood Registry!
Sponsored by CBR, a wholly owned subsidiary of AMAG Pharmaceuticals.