Back in 2009 it was my first year at uni and my boyfriend and I decided to give anal a go. We went to the nearest Ann Summers and bought this heat sensation lube.
Fast forward a few hours we finish what felt like a knife jabbing into my ass (he was well endowed). I went into the bathroom to clean up and felt what I thought was lube dripping from between my legs… Looked down and saw HUGE SPLATS OF BLOOD. Well k fainted and net thing I remember is my boyfriend waking me up in a cold shower attending to the cut across my temple and a bag of frozen peas on my ass.

What a waste of 15 seconds

Back when I first started in uni my diet consisted of beer and instant noodles - standard. One night of heavy beer drinking I got home really drunk and was craving some ramen. Went ahead and cooked it and started to eat it instantly but it was too hot for my throat so I vomited up a ramen foamy beer vomit into the bowl. It was my last ramen so decided to go ahead and eat the lot. Woke up the next morning feeling like a hunger satisfied abomination to mankind.

Because I’m a catholic does that mean I need a priest, Eucharist, dove, bible, chalice, and rosary beads emojis? Not quite. Let’s keep religion to ourselves as opposed to shoving it in other people’s faces. Nobody needs Muslim or any other religious-specific emojis.

Number 12 is from Tangled, not Harry Potter