Maniacal woman’s resolution is to kill you as soon as possible.
THESE ARE METAPHORS.
After staying up all night, editing my stupid list, this is the final draft.
Just for you, ladies!
Girlie dumbbell and chocolate and an exclamation point!
“Man looking at cigarette (contemplating eating it).”
“Teenage girl with nicotine patch quitting smoking”
Get that fucking smile off your face.
“Man with belly pooch looks at workout device”
All images via Getty Images.
- The Army Corps of Engineers and North Dakota police have ordered protesters to leave the Dakota Access Pipeline site by this afternoon or face arrest.
- Seven Earth-sized planets that could have water and possibly sustain life have been discovered orbiting a dwarf star, NASA announced today.
- The ACLU is suing the city of Milwaukee and its police for allegedly performing thousands of illegal stop-and-frisk searches that targeted minorities.
- #Peggygate: West Elm offers full refunds for the notoriously disintegrating Peggy Couch days after pulling it from its website and stores👏