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The 13 Worst Things For Sale On Amazon

Including a $550 cat hamster wheel (pictured) and "Dude Wipes." Via the excellent The Worst Things For Sale.

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1.

It's a pencil shaped like a shell. It costs $57. You get crap all over your fingers. It costs $57.

It's a pencil shaped like a shell. It costs $57. You get crap all over your fingers. It costs $57.

2.

View this video on YouTube

The Toy Go Round Exercise Wheel costs $550.

If you have a cat, you know that this is the most useless thing ever invented.

Remember: this video is the best demonstration they could come up with.

3.

Form the Description:"Whether youre a social media novice or an online networking guru, thinking up things to post can be perplexing. With Tweets & Status Updates for All Occasions at the keyboard, your virtual musings are sure to be instantly, effortlessly wittyand endlessly re-tweetable. Chapters range from ""Interposal Posts"" to ""Cultural Comments""..."

Form the Description:

"Whether youre a social media novice or an online networking guru, thinking up things to post can be perplexing. With Tweets & Status Updates for All Occasions at the keyboard, your virtual musings are sure to be instantly, effortlessly wittyand endlessly re-tweetable. Chapters range from ""Interposal Posts"" to ""Cultural Comments""..."

4.

The Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer.This actually would cost you time, I believe.

The Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer.

This actually would cost you time, I believe.

5.

Turn any tree into a Detroit Lions fan.They can use every fan they can get.This does not compute in my brain.$19.99.

Turn any tree into a Detroit Lions fan.

They can use every fan they can get.

This does not compute in my brain.

$19.99.

6.

For wiping your penis, balls, taint, and ass crack, "pre- or post-gym."20 bucks for a box of 30, DUDE.

For wiping your penis, balls, taint, and ass crack, "pre- or post-gym."

20 bucks for a box of 30, DUDE.

7.

The Relaxman.There’s a heated waterbag inside that you sit on, and it plays music to you.It costs...$49,999.95.

The Relaxman.

There’s a heated waterbag inside that you sit on, and it plays music to you.

It costs...$49,999.95.

8.

Party Rats Finger Lights 5-Pack.Yeah. IDEAL.

Party Rats Finger Lights 5-Pack.

Yeah. IDEAL.

9.

The Wiper Mirror.$130.

The Wiper Mirror.

$130.

10.

The Beehive Cake Pan.To make a cake that is shaped like a beehive.

The Beehive Cake Pan.

To make a cake that is shaped like a beehive.

11.

I bet he now cusses himself to sleep every night.

I bet he now cusses himself to sleep every night.

12.

Obsidian Healing Orb.Price reduced to $1,595!It repels negative spirits, and includes: “Chakras: All.”

Obsidian Healing Orb.

Price reduced to $1,595!

It repels negative spirits, and includes: “Chakras: All.”

13.

BREAK-IN TO ROB US OF OUR APPLE PRODUCTS.

BREAK-IN TO ROB US OF OUR APPLE PRODUCTS.

Via my new favorite website: The Worst Things For Sale.

Bookmark it. He updates daily.