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    Great Idea—Pedestrian Penalty Cards

    I need a set of these to hand out, NOW, before I actually kill somebody. We'll proceed from lowest penalties to highest.


    Left—5.2?!? Are you kidding me? This is a 10, minimum. And I need versions for German and French tourists, too, fucking gits. Right—Run on the road or in a park, douchebag.


    Left—Let's see how carefree you are with a forearm shiver to the base of your neck. Right—I never pause for these morons. NEVER.


    Left—this is a major pedestrian traffic problem in NYC. Hot people—take cabs, dress in garbage bags, or stay home. Right—That's unfair to get mad at the dogs. Just punch the guy square on the button.


    Now we're getting to the felonies. Left—These are the guys I've come closet to seriously injuring. Right—9.2?!? This should be an 11. I've said something to these types of peoples many times.


    Left—the big umbrella guys (often Wall Street assholes)? I just walk smack right into them. Heaven help any of them that say anything back to me. This is the worst offense. Right—This is bad, but not as bad some of the others.

    The project is by Emmy-winning writer designer Cory Bortnicker and designer Andy Jimison. Your can buy the whole, high resolution 14-card set here for a buck. Then, print them out, hand them out, and start doing your part in making your city a better place to walk.

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